The 313 Second Movie Review: "Transformers"

Movies, movies, movies! Can't get enough movies! Oh, what's up, gang? Welcome back to the 313 Second Movie Review. Today, we'll be looking into one of the most-looked-forward-to summer blockbusters to come out this year, "Transformers." The film stars Shia LaBeouf as Sam Witwicky, Megan Fox as Mikaela Banes, Josh Duhamel as Sergeant Lennox, Tyrese Gibson as USAF Tech Sergeant Epps, Jon Voight as Defense Secretary John Keller, Peter Cullen as Optimus Prime, and Hugo Weaving as Megatron. Trust me, people, any preconceived notions you may have about Michael Bay will vanish after this movie. Of course, I didn't have any to start with because this guy thinks Michael Bay is a genius. *runs* Now, our hero of the film is Sam, a high school junior. His great-grandfather was considered one of the greatest Arctic explorers ever, but when he claimed to have found a giant ice man, all his credibility went down the pooper. His great-grandfather's work now seemingly worthless, Sam began selling some of his stuff on eBay as a way to pay for a new car. What he gets is a beat-up Chevrolet Camero, sold by the always-funny Bernie Mac. Sam tries to use the car to rescue his dreamgirl, Mikaela, from her Neaderthal boyfriend, and viola! He's a got a girlfriend. Too bad shortly after, he's on his mom's bike, chasing his stolen car. What he discovers though, is his car has turned into a three-story tall machinacal organism, using a spotlight to assumingly summon his commrades. Meanwhile, on an American military base in Qatar, two soldiers, Lennox and Epps, have just escaped an attack from a machine that went from a helicopter to a dangerous giant robot. As the robot was destroyed the base, he unleashed a smaller robot, who's chattering noises makes it deceptively funny, downloaded high priority, secretive government files. Guessing America is under attack (take you pick, China, Iran, North Korea, or Russia?), Defense Secretary Keller gets the troops ready for combat, while he rounds up the top hackers in the country to track who is responsible for the attack in Qatar and stealing of the files. One of those hackers is the nose-pierced, hot Australian Maggie Madsen, who goes her own and gets computer geek Glen Whitmann to crack the code. He finds something very startling, the two groups of robots, the Autobots and Decipitcons, two races of alien robots are fighting in an intergalactic war. America isn't under attack, but Earth is serving as a robotic reenactment of Normandy on D-Day. As a Detroiter, I was very pleased to see General Motors being shamelessly plugged, so that's always good for the struggling regional economy. Plus, many scenes were shot in Detroit in the final half-hour of the movie. On a scene shot on Woodward Avenue, where the Filmore Detroit and the State Bar are disguised as other buildings. Meanwhile, the Guardian Building, the Cadillac Building, and portion of Congress Street that goes from Joe Louis Arena to Woodward Avenue are also shown. The green sign of Fort Street is prominetley displayed. Most notably, the abdonded Michigan Central Station, a rotting former train station, is used for the climictic final showdown between Otimus Prime and Megatron. What isn't there to like in this movie? Big robots from another part of the solar system, computer game geekdom, hot chicks, and a proud, patroitic and individualistic feeling as you walk out. I remember playing with Transformers when I was a young child, and I remember vividly watching the cartoons. This really gives be a brand new appreciation of the Transformers line. I can't help but feel proud that as child, I idolized Optimus Prime and dispised Megatron. I feel that feeling of devotation to Transformers coming back to me all over again. Granted, I might not revert to toys, but it is fun to see those memories again, just projected on the big screen.

My time's up, you've been great. For the road: Nelly Furtado "All Good Things (Come To An End)"