The 313 Second Movie Review: "Stardust"

Well, hope I haven't been gone too long. LOL. Welcome back to 313 Second Movie Review. I'm going to review one more movie for the weekend. This time, the movie is the British/American film "Stardust." The film stars Charlie Cox as Tristran, Claire Danes as Yvaine, Michelle Pfeiffer as Lamia, Robert De Niro as Captain Shakespeare, Ricky Gervais as Ferdy the Fence, Sienna Miller as Victoria, Henry Cavill as Humphrey, Peter O'Toole as King, Sarah Alexander as Empusa, Jason Flemyng as Primus, and Rupert Everett as Secundus. The film revolves around young Tristran, a maturing teenager living with his father in the British village of Wall in the mid-nineteenth century and harboring a crush for the lovely but self-centered Victoria. In order to show Victoria how much he loves her, he goes on a perilous journey to catch the falling star they saw together. For Tristran, that means going from Wall to the magical village Stormhold and getting around the elederly gatekeeper keeping people out of Stormhold. What Tristran doesn't know, but we do from the beginning of the film, he's not the only one who crossed the wall. The only other person to dodge the gatekeeper was his father. While in Stormhold, he met a beautiful witch's slave. They hook up, and guess what arrives nine months later at his doorstep. You guessed it. Tristran! One thing about Stormhold is that you cannot go anywhere without crossing danger. The dying King has offered up his three remaining sons (Secundus the most evil) the chance to succeed, but they must outwit (and outlive) each other. Meanwhile, they are watched from beyond by their four deceased brothers, who provide sarcastic and joking commentary. While the princes search for the same falling star as Tristran, a witch, Lamia, is also on the hunt. Lamia and her three hard-headed but just as wicked sister are really old hags, but Lamia uses some power to restore her youth. If she gets the star, Lamia and her sisters will have their youth restored for centuries. What Tristran, the princes, and Lamia are unaware of is that the star has now taken human form (and dare I say, stars are sex-ay) named Yvaine. She really sticks out with her odd personality quirks, but she is pretty normal in some senses. For example, she doesn't want to be Tristran's gift to Victoria (can't blame her). I want to give you more, but if I divulge too much, it might jeopardize the plot. I will say you will love the gay pirate Captain Shakespeare, the trader Ferdy the Fence, the soothsayer, and even the narration of Ian McKellan. "Stardust" provides both excitement and humor throughout. It does have a lot of characters, but it doesn't slow the film down at all. I know "Stardust" didn't do to well at the box office, but that is crime suffered by "Zodiac," "Grindhouse," and "Evan Almighty." A perfectly good movie goes bust at the box office, despite high marks. That's just not right. Here's my advice, guys. Give this movie a shot. It will leave you starstruck.

And finally, I have good news. I've been to the cinema for 15 consecutive weekends, seeing 19 movies. Now, this weekend, I finally have planned for me a break. But weep not. I will be back next weekend with a review of "The Nanny Diaries." Then I'll take a longer break before seeing "Good Luck Chuck." And after that will be an even longer break before the Russell Crowe and Denzel Washington flick "American Gangster." But don't worry, I'll be reviewing new movies up to the end of the year.

My time's up, you've been great. For the road: Kia Shine "Krispy"