Monday, May 31, 2010

TiVo Guide Week of May 31, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"Jersey Shore" A reality series set in Seaside Heights, N.J., follows four guys and four girls who are living together for the summer in a rented beach house. Monday at 2 on MTV.

"National Spelling Bee" The championship rounds of the 83rd annual event in Washington, D.C. The competition began with a record 274 spellers aged 8 to 15. Last year's winner was Kavya Shivashankar from Kansas, who won spelling the word "Laodicean." Friday at 8 on ABC.

"2010 MTV Movie Awards" Aziz Ansari hosts the 19th annual bash at the Gibson Amphitheatre in Los Angeles. "The Hangover" leads the pack with six nominations, followed by "New Moon" and "Avatar" with five nods each. Christina Aguilera is scheduled to perform her single "Not Myself Tonight." Presenters include Zac Efron; Bradley Cooper; Cameron Diaz; Jonah Hill; Tom Cruise; Shaun White; and Russell Brand. Sunday at 9 on MTV.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Over the Limit observations

How about a first-hand account of Over the Limit from someone who was there? This was my second WWE show (first was Raw in October 2002 where Kane defeated Triple H in casket match thanks to Shawn Michaels). Like the first time I was there, my dad was with me, and I think he enjoyed this more than Raw.

Our seats were at the left side of the from stage when looking through the camera. Loved the classic and new cars on the stage. What can I say, this is Detroit, and we love our automobiles here.

Dark match was Chavo Guerrero vs. MVP. For a dark match, the crowd seemed to like it. MVP hit the Ballin' Elbow and set up for the Play Maker, but Chavo countered into the Three Amigos. Before he could hit the third, though, MVP reversed out and hit the Play Maker. BALLGAME! I just wish this match was on the card. They are two super-talented competitors, and it sucks that MVP didn't have a match for the actual PPV and that Chavo is still stuck losing, although this match was more tightly fought than his recent TV matches. Good pop for MVP, plenty of heat for Chavo.

Michael Cole got about a 3:2 ratio of people booing him to the cheers. Matt Striker was 50/50. Jerry Lawler, as per usual, was all pop. Carlos Cabrera and Hugo Savinovich, the Spanish announce team, were well-received, and I think it's mainly because Joe Louis Arena is just blocks away from Detroit's Mexicantown neighborhood.

The crowd was yucking it up during the fake driver's ed film in the beginning, and the build-up video for the matches was superb. Because of where our seats were, the pyro was louder than I anticipated. And it didn't help that following the opening fireworks was Kofi Kingston's entrance. I CAN'T HEAR ANYMORE!

Kofi was wildly over with the crowd. They kept cheering for him all match. Well, I don't know exactly what was heard on TV, but the area I was in was very vocal. Drew McIntyre, as you could expect, got tons of heat. A solid back-and-forth match. You thought one was going to put the other away, they kick out. The S.O.S. just came out of nowhere, and when Kofi got the pin, the Joe exploded. And it needs to be said. HERE IS YOUR WINNER, AND THE NEWW (that's as many W's as I'm allowed here) WWE INTERCONTINETAL CHAMPION, KOFI KINGSTON! Lemme say, it is fun going, "BOOM, BOOM, BOOM," in person. I was worried when McIntyre grabbed the mic, he would play the Mr. McMahon card, but when Kofi made it backstage, I knew he was safe. Matt Hardy, well, let's just say we all went ape$#!t when he showed up. Twist of Fate, good night, Mac. WWE, listen to me, the people still love Matt Hardy.

Punk was being booed hard during his backstage segment, I couldn't even hear what he was saying. I thought I heard him say something about Detroit, but I missed it over the heat.

I'm only learning now that there were spots from the R-Truth vs. Ted DiBiase match that didn't happen, particularly involving Virgil. It may be that DiBiase is hurt, and I just read it was a concussion from a slap Truth gave DiBiase early in the match. Anyways, as you may imagine, crowd was into Truth (WHAT'S UP) and giving it to DiBiase. The whole match, my section kept trying to give support to Truth when he was in trouble and they were really into the signature moves. A lot of eyes were focused on Virgil through the match. They wanted to see if you was going to do something dirty. Once Truth hit the Ax Kick, everybody was really enjoying that. I thought there would be drama with DiBiase and Virgil, but nothing materialized. Damn!

Drew McIntyre's character is an absolute bitch, and I mean the whiny kind. I could sense a lot of the fans would have jumped backstage and attacked him if he destroyed Teddy Long's picture of Martin Luther King, Jr. It pissed me off hearing McIntyre say King was more of a revolutionary than Long, which is true. The problem was the messenger. King worked to improve the world, while McIntyre expects to have everything given to him on a silver platter. Today's word, boys and girls, is hypocrite.

Even my dad, not the biggest wrestling aficionado, was getting into the CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio match (OW, MY EARS). Solid support for Mysterio throughout, and Punk got it bad. I couldn't see where Mysterio cut open Punk originally, but my dad said it was when Mysterio bashed Punk's head on the barber chair. Tossing Mysterio into the chair was a smart move to clean up Punk, but it had two issues. One, they took forever to stitch up Punk (cue the "BULLSHIT" chants). Second, my dad said it looked like Mysterio broke his arm when he was tossed into the chair. Er, dad, if that were true, there would have been some help. Anyways, my dad said that was his favorite match. I think he liked the contrasting styles of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu vs. the Mexican Lucha Libre. The whole time, the crowd was nuts, and the seesaw battle for control kept them into it. My section did an "Eddie" chant twice, but I don't know if caught on with the rest of the crowd. Punk made that one little mistake, and the crowd exploded again. People were mimicking a head being shaved right until the masked member of the SES attacked. Once Luke Gallows and Serena (where the hell were they in this match) broke out the handcuffs, we thought it was trouble. Kane (WHAT DID YOU SAY) was a complete and delightful surprise, and he cleaned house on on the SES. Crowd went nuts for him because of the surprise appearance. I was following Kane for so long, I completely missed Mysterio slap the first set of cuffs on Punk. When I saw it, I knew it was going to be amazing. A 619 later, Mysterio grabs the second cuffs and how symbolic it was, watching the cult messiah hanging from the ropes like he is about to be crucified. In a matter of seconds, Punk was a shell of his former self, his face covered in hair clippings, sweat, and blood. The whole time, the atmosphere was electric. The crowd was eating it up. Serena comes in with a towel to cover up (but all knew it was to stop the bleeding). When Mysterio broke out the mirror and showed Punk what he had become, I knew what we had witnessed was a crowning moment of awesome.

I could hardly hear what was the funniest line in the Big Show/Chris Jericho conversation, so if anybody heard let me know. I thought it was hysterical, though, the Show knew The Miz was behind him. I thought Miz was going to jump him, but Show put an end to that.

The tag team title match was baffling. I cannot believe that people were actually chanting "Y2J." Miz, definitely had heat on him. Hart Dynasty, good applause, but I think the fans will get louder the more they see them. And even from my seats, Natalya is smoking in person. I think everyone in the building thought it was over when Jericho blasted Kidd with the Codebreaker, but NOOOO!. Let me say, these four are fun to see in person. The skills of Jericho and Miz, the acrobatics of Kidd, and the strength of Smith need to be seen to be believed. And I saved Smith strength for last for a reason. It's not everyday you see somebody simply walk away from Miz's clothesline while carrying the Miz, and I was shocked he did that, but it was an excellent step up for the Hart Attack. Solid match.

Edge (OH, MY POOR EARS) vs. Randy Orton came up next. Like R-Truth vs. Ted DiBiase and CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio, I was drooling for this potentially amazing match. Here's the funny thing. During Mysterio's entrance, fans were singing along to his theme. Same with Orton. Throughout my section, you could fans singing, "I hear voices in my head, they talk to me, they understand, they to talk to me..." God, the fans were ecstatic to see him. I even did the pose (you know the one). A real solid back-and-forth showing from these two future HOFers. Surprisingly, for every ten people chanting, "Let's go Orton," there were three to counter with "Let's go Edge." I have no idea except to say that Edge is awesome. My dad was laughing when Edge and Orton exchanged punches as the crowd reacted (Boo! Yay! Boo! Yay!). I think they were merely teasing the ending and could have gone at least an extra five minutes. I was prepped for the RKO, but when Orton stopped pounding the ring, I knew something was wrong. Seconds later, I looked at the ref and I saw the dreaded X hand gesture. As they went outside, it was clear that Orton's shoulder was dislocated. It was significantly lower than the other. I gotta feel for Edge, though. Spearing the barricade headfirst, ouch! Some fans were booing the double countout finish, but I think they may have missed the X. My fingers are crossed for you, Orton. I know he has an extensive history of shoulder injuries, so I hope he'll be OK. At the end, I tried to start an obvation to support Orton, but as usual with me, it didn't catch on.

Still deaf, we get Big Show vs. Jack Swagger. Let's just say I psyched for this one. What was Mr. Kennedy's nickname for Tony Chimmel, the round mouth of sound? If so, agreed. Swagger got tons of heat, while Show (IS THERE AN EAR DOCTOR IN THE HOUSE) was well over. My section once again served as the WWE choir (Weeeeeeeeeell, well it's the Big Shooooooooow...). I heard people say you need to see Big Show in person to appreciate his size. That's no lie. Even my dad was in awe of big he was. And seeing his strength in person is impressive, too. Let's face it, Swagger's no cruiserweight, but Show tossed him around like a rag doll, and it was a sight to behold. As Show told the audience to be quite so we could listen to him slap Swagger's chest, you could hear a pin drop, which is not an easy task at the JLA. The slap literally echoes through the arena, and then people do the Ric Flair "WOOOOOOOOO!" When Swagger started attacking Show's leg, I had to explain to my dad the strategy of taking out his legs to ground him (like I did in the tag match over how important it is to keep your opponent isolated in your corner). When Show started making the comeback, people were sensing a title change at hand. We even joined him in doing the hand gesture to signal for the choke slam. I wasn't happy Swagger used the belt to end the match, but seeing Show get up after the belt and chair shots is incredible. I think anybody would be sore after all that, no matter how big they are. But Show, wow, get him angry and he turns into a white Incredible Hulk. He went to town on Swagger with that chair, and my dad was astounded that it took one shot from Show to bend the chair as much as it was. The crowd loved seeing the choke slam on to the chair, and since it was bent, RIP, Swagger's upper back. Everybody was going nuts for the knockout punch. I may have geeked out and yelled, "Falcon Punch," when he did it, but I don't care.

Funny thing during the Batista and Josh Matthews interview. When Batista said he made John Cena say, "I quit," at the end of Raw last Monday, I heard various forms of, "Yeah, right!" Gotta agree.

Eve and Maryse. I didn't mention it with my dad around, but I figured Eve is the strap, Natalya is the ass, and Maryse is the clean-up. Crowd liked this match, but not as much as the previous matches. Some kids behind me tried to get "Let's go, Eve" chant going, and I tried to help them out, but it died quickly. Strong match, Maryse dominating early, but Eve fighting back. These two are amazing women and they could be right up there with Trish, Lita, Mickie, Melina, and Beth in terms of being quality Divas in the future. Like Natalya, both Eve and Maryse are finer in person, even when you're quite a distance away. Liked Eve's finisher, very innovative and different. Tell me that wouldn't hurt. By the way, when Maryse went spread eagle between Eve's raised legs, I could tell my dad was thinking dirty thoughts. And this is a guy who for all I know doesn't look at Internet porn.

Oh, man, I was hyped up for Batista vs. Cena. Batista was booed all the way through his normal act, and the cheers for Cena blew the ceiling of Joe Louis Arena across the Detroit River into Windsor. Cue the choir. "Your time is up, my time is now, you can't see me, my time is now!" When Batista got on the mic and said he made Cena say, "I quit," on Monday, there were fans around me that said, "He said, 'I quit!' End the match!" That was very attentive. Cena's response to Batista was gold. Also cracked up when Cena grabbed the bottle of water to wake Batista up. Batista vs. Cena is always fun to watch, but what was funny to watch was the battle in the stands between the Cena fans and haters. Behind me, they were looking at each other, so one group (the haters) were ignoring the match as they exchanged chants of "Let's go Cena" (of course, I helped with that one, and I actually wasn't the only deep-voiced male saying it) and "Cena sucks!" How would the haters know? They're focused on the Cena supporters and have their backs turned to the ring! It was fun to actually say, "You can't see me," in public and know nobody will judge you. Seeing the Spanish announcer's table be destroyed was beautiful, as pieces of it flew about in the air. I have no idea how Cena cut himself there. I am still stumped trying to figure it out. Every time Cena was asked if he wanted to quit, you could hear a very loud "NO!" echo through the arena. In contrast, there was a vocal "YES!" when Batista got the same question. The action in the stands was so cool to watch. Sure, I had to stand up and look at the arena's scoreboard to see, but it was worth it. For the rest of show, it was the only time my dad stood up (like I said, he's not as big a fan as I am). But this was cool to watch. Literally, they were down 14 rows and one section to my left when they went at it at the ramp rails. When Batista went over, I wasn't the only one going "HOLY SHIT!" It was crazy watching them fight back down, and before the match, I had a feeling the cars would come into play. I just couldn't believe Cena could take that may chair shots and not want to quit had it been real. So, when Batista was getting in the car, I asked myself if Batista had a set of keys for that classic Mustang or if he knew how to hot wire a car. I kept looking for Cena when Batista backed the car up, but my seats didn't provide me with a great angle (it looked like the car was behind the Titantron). I knew he'd show up, and I wasn't disappointed. An Attitude Adjustment on the hood of a car, I'm sorry, I don't care how big you are, that will hurt for a while. When Batista said he wouldn't quit and Cena said he was hoping he'd say that, I couldn't wait to see what plan Cena had. I thought he was going to do an AA onto the windshield, but when he climbed to the top I was expecting to see Batista go splat. Then, true to his character as of late, he wusses out and says, "I quit." Disappointed Cena didn't dispatch him on the stage, but that turned to glee when he dropped him THROUGH the stage. I just read that one or both of the last two bumps gave Batista a back and/or tailbone injury. Again, "HOLY SHIT!" At least in my section. Loved when he posed with the fan with the "Cena is not a quitter" sign. Even the haters were giving Cena a well-deserved applause when Sheamus gave him a boot the head. Let me say, TV doesn't do his paleness justice. Stop the cameras.

Cena got up about two or three minutes later, first sitting, and then standing, just trying to laugh off the kick. Hey, the show was over, he could get away with it then. Meanwhile, they have EMTs with a stretcher trying to get to Batista, but I don't know if they got to him. Cena celebrates one last time and his music hits to wrap it up, and Justin Roberts thanks us for coming.

All in all, it was a great show. I see you guys are bitching about the booking, but they kept the fans hot throughout the show. Once again, the Detroit crowd proved they love this stuff. Even my dad, a non-viewer, said it was a great show and looked at Punk vs. Mysterio as the highlight of the night (more so the match than the head shaving, but he liked that too). He said everybody who competed on the PPV really did well and said they were all very talented, which I agree on. It was an absolutely raucous event and was so fun to go to. Not exactly WrestleMania XXVI, but the Superstars kept the whole thing going so well, the crowd was into it from the word go. My hats off to my parents for getting me the tickets for my birthday, and the WWE for putting on a hell of a show.

Well, I think I've said my piece. Thanks for reading.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

TiVo Guide Week of May 24, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"Chuck" In the Season 3 finale, shadowy thugs from the Ring inch closer to take down Chuck and his team, but not if Chuck's father (Scott Bakula) has anything to say about it. Elsewhere, Casey undertakes a clandestine mission to protect his daughter from the Ring; and big news about the Buy More floors Big Mike. Monday at 8 on NBC.

"The Bachelorette" Bachelorette Ali Fedotowsky, who chose her job over Bachelor Jake Pavelka (who then snubbed her when she changed her mind), gets to do the snubbing this time, sifting through 25 guys---eight of whom won't make it beyond the Season 6 premiere. They'll be eliminated after the initial get-togethers, in which one contestant does a backflip off the limousine, another shows her his Ali scrapbook and another serenades her on his ukulele. She also receives a marriage proposal. Monday at 9 on ABC.

"Dancing With the Stars" A winner is announced in the 10th-season finale. Included: The three finalists perform their favorite dances; all of the season's contestants return to perform; and the Top 2 teams in the college dance-team competition face off. Tuesday at 9 on ABC.

"So You Think You Can Dance" The seventh season begins with the first two rounds of auditions. Thursday at 8 on Fox.

Over the Limit results

Was the show fun? Absolutely, and I will divulge more on Thursday. Did I succeed with my picks? Well, that was one of the things that went wrong for me. I managaed to post a 3-4 record (I tossed out the Edge vs. Randy Orton match because of the double countout. Hope the shoulder is doing better, Orton). My record now drops to 246-218. Thanks to Big Show, Kofi Kingston, and Rey Mysterio for getting the W's. No thanks to Batista, Chris Jericho & The Miz, Maryse, and Ted DiBiase for getting the losses. Well, maybe my fortunes will turn around at Fatal Four-Way. We'll wait and see.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Over the Limit card and picks

I Quit Match for the WWE Championship
Batista vs. John Cena

World Heavyweight Title Match
Big Show vs. Jack Swagger

WWE Intercontinental Title Match
Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre

WWE Unified Tag Team Title Match
Chris Jericho & The Miz vs. The Hart Dynasty

WWE Divas Title Match
Maryse vs. Eve Torres

SES Pledge vs. Punk's Hair
Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk

Edge vs. Randy Orton

R-Truth vs. Ted DiBiase

Did I mention I am going to this show tonight? Because just in case I haven't, I AM! BOOYAH! Anyways, I've been in a bit of a slump lately and my record is down to 243-214. Now, I'm normally not this dangerous when making picks, and I while the non-title matches are anyone's guess, I think all the challengers will win the title matches. Whether or not that means the title will change hands is to be seen (of course, the title would change hands in the I Quit match). So who are all of my picks? I got Batista, Big Show, Kofi Kingston, Chris Jericho & The Miz, Maryse, Rey Mysterio, Randy Orton, and Ted DiBiase. Wish me luck. I'll have more about the show on my Thursday post.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Things I have learned from becoming an "NCIS" addict

1. Never, under any circumstances, even accidentally, drink a Marine's coffee if you value your life.

2. When the boss gets fed up with technology, just pull out a new cell phone from the file cabinet.

3. Goths can be happy.

4. Anybody who has the capability of murdering you should not be messed with, so stay anyway from anybody who trained in Mossad.

5. Fed up with people below you in rank? Slap them upside the head.

6. When your work is done, just put your feet up on the desk and relax.

7. Always be sure you can be reached on your cell phone.

8. Be greatful for technology. You could be going through bank statements by hand.

9. When trying to figure out how to work an antique machine, never say you need a brontosaurus who can work it. Your boss may know how to.

10. Again, never drink a Marine's coffee.

11. Cote de Pablo is Chile's greatest export to the United States.

Monday, May 17, 2010

TiVo Guide Week of May 17, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"Gossip Girl" In the third-season finale, Blair must make a decision about her future with Chuck. Meanwhile, a post on Gossip Girl about Dan causes problems for Nate and Serena; Dorota has her baby; Georgina returns to town; and things go from bad to worse for Jenny. Monday at 9 on The CW.

"American Idol" The final three contestants each perform two songs---one a judges' choice and the other a choice of their own. Tuesday at 8 on Fox.

"Glee" Will's high-school rival (Neil Patrick Harris) shows up and causes trouble for the glee club. Meanwhile, Rachel struggles with a longstanding personal problem; and Artie's dream leads to an adventure. Tuesday at 9 on Fox.

"Community" In the Season 1 finale, Britta and Professor Slater vie for Jeff's affections. Meanwhile, Abed doesn't ask Troy to move in with him, leaving Troy feeling confused about their friendship. Thursday at 8 on NBC.

"Party Down" When he overhears aspiring screenwriter Roman talking about his script, birthday boy Steve Guttenberg (as himself) offers to turn his party into a writers seminar. Friday at 10 on Starz.

"Lost" The series finale. Sunday at 9 on ABC.

"Family Guy" Season 9 finale: The "Star Wars" saga, "Family Guy"-style, continues with Peter's spin on "The Empire Strikes Back." Sunday at 9 on Fox.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Good-bye "Law & Order"

A show that is almost as old as I am, "Law & Order" will be ending on May 24 after 20 amazing seasons. That iconic "chung-chung" sound isn't just for drinking games. It's TV history. I gotta say that Dick Wolf created one of the best shows in history when he developed this. And what about the cast? Thank you for all the memories, George Dzundza, Chris Noth, Dann Florek, Michael Moriarty, Richard Brooks, Steven Hill, Paul Sorvino, Jerry Orbach, Carolyn McCormick, S. Epatha Merkerson, Jill Hennessy, Sam Waterston, Benjamin Bratt, Carey Lowell, Angie Harmon, Jesse L. Martin, Diane Wiest, Elisabeth Rohm, Fred Dalton Thompson, Dennis Farina, Annie Parisse, Michael Imperioli, Milena Govich, Alana de la Graza, Jeremy Sisto, Linus Roache, and Anthony Anderson. Plus, it was just a part of New York culture as it was TV culture. Based there, shot there, employed people from there, brought the tourists there, and brought the money there. From the run down days of the early ninties to Guillani's revival to 9/11 and the united we stand mentality they developed afterwards, this show was all about New York. Farwell, "Law & Order."

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

TiVo Guide Week of May 10, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"Glee" Rachel is alarmed when she gets a sore throat. Meanwhile, Kurt makes a personality adjustment to please his dad; and Puck looks to climb in social ranking by making a calculated move. Tuesday at 9 on Fox.

"The Good Wife" The winner is announced in the competition between Alicia and Cary to stay with the firm as a junior associate. Meanwhile, Alicia gets involved in a divorce case. Tuesday at 10 on CBS.

"Vampire Diaries" The first season concludes with a Founder's Day celebration that ends in destruction and death due to a plan set in motion by Johnathan Gilbert. Meanwhile, Elena tries to repair her relationship with Jeremy; Caroline attempts to mend Matt and Tyler's friendship. Thursday at 8 on The CW.

"Private Practice" Season 3 finale: While Addison, Amelia and Fife struggle to save Maya and her unborn baby, Sam operates on another car-crash victim. Meanwhile, Cooper tries again with Charlotte. Thursday at 10:01 on ABC.

"Smallville" In the Season 9 finale, Zod claims to be the Blur and asks Lois to steal the Book of Rao from Clark; Lois asks Clark for full disclosure, but he refuses; Oliver disappears while he and Chloe attempt to fight the Kandorians by reconnecting Watchtower's satellites; Tess is seriously injured after confronting Zod; and Clark and Zod have a showdown as they battle for Earth. Friday at 8 on The CW.

"Friday Night Lights" The Lions gain a star player after a West Dillon controversy; Eric tries to pick up his team's spirits; Tami makes a decision that ruffles feathers; Matt has a run-in with a local artist; and Riggins finds a new place to live. Friday at 8 on NBC.

"Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains" In the season finale, the five remaining castaways attempt to make it to the final tribal council, where the jury questions them before voting for the $1 million winner. Sunday at 8 on CBS.

Thursday, May 06, 2010

Mother's Day, 313 Style

I will be celebrating the moms in my life in the traditional manner this Sunday, but at this blog, you know I like do things a little unorthodox. So why not celebrate Mother's Day here with my favorite celebrity MILF, Britney Spears.

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

TiVo Guide Week of May 3, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"Chuck" Chuck and Sarah train under the tutelage of a married CIA team (Fred Willard and Swoosie Kurtz), who have a glowing record together but despise one another. In another training mission, Casey must show the spy ropes to an unlikely student---Morgan. Monday at 8 on NBC.

"Biggest Loser: Couples" The final six contestants receive makeovers, which include a $1000 shopping spree and a salon visit with stylist Jonathan Antin. After the transformations, the players reveal their new looks to family and friends and attend a concert by Ashanti. Later, the contestants are suspended over a pool while working out on cardio machines. Tuesday at 8 on NBC.

"Lost" Jack questions Locke's motives after he's asked to perform a tough task. Anthony Cooper: Kevin Tighe. Helen: Katey Sagal. Tuesday at 9 on ABC.

"American Idol" One of the final five singers is eliminated. Harry Connick Jr. and Lady Gaga perform. Wednesday at 9 on Fox.

"Cougar Town" Jules and Grayson ponder a "friends with benefits" relationship; Andy hires a nanny; Bobby hatches an unusual moneymaking scheme that yields dividends for Travis. Wednesday at 9:30 on ABC.

"30 Rock" Mother's Day equals mommy issues at "TGS": Jack's mother (Elaine Stritch) gets mixed up in his messy love life; Liz's mom (Anita Gillette) reconnects with a former flame; Jenna's oddball parent (Jan Hooks) arrives; and Tracy's "mom" (Novella Nelson) teaches him a valuable lesson. Appearing: Buzz Aldrin; Elizabeth Banks; Cheyenne Jackson; and Patti LuPone. Thursday at 9:30 on NBC.

"'Til Death" Ally's baby shower is nearing and Joy's becoming obsessed with it, but Mr. White can't come up with a gift idea. Meanwhile, Dr. Bialik invites old friends (Mayim Bialik's "Blossom" cast mates Jenna Von Oy and Michael Stoyanov) to Doug's therapy session. Sunday at 7 on Fox.