TiVo Guide Week of August 30, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"The Closer" Brenda investigates the shooting deaths of three soldiers who had just returned from Afghanistan. With national-security issues surrounding the case, Brenda finds herself in an investigative tug-of-war with a military officer (Gary Cole). Monday at 9 on TNT.

"30 for 30" The 1982 Little League World Series champions from Kirkland, Wash., are profiled in "Little Big Men." Directors Al Szymanski and Peter Franchella catch up with Cody Webster and other team members who broke a lengthy U.S. drought in Williamsport, Pa. Tuesday at 8 on ESPN.

There is justice in the world!

Watch and laugh.

TiVo Guide Week of August 23, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"Huge" Part 1 of 2. The camp hosts parents' weekend, but Will's mom and dad are no-shows. Meanwhile, Alistair puts on a charade of being Becca's boyfriend; and Amber's mother smuggles in some food. Monday at 9 on ABC Family.

"Top Chef: Washington D.C." The six remaining culinarians play ball, commandeering two baseball concession stands at Nationals Park in Washington, D.C. They step up to the plate to create game snacks, adding a high-end culinary quality to the fare. Baseball players Adam Dunn, Matt Capps and John Lannan make appearances. Rick Moonen is the guest judge. Wednesday at 10 on Bravo.

"Emmys Red Carpet Countdown" Celebrity interviews on the red carpet and Emmy predictions. Hosts: Marc Istook, Tanika Ray and Lawrence Zarian. Sunday at 5 on TV Guide Network.

"Emmys Red Carpet With Chris Harrison" Chris Harrison interviews celebrities on the red carpet at the 2010 Emmys. Sunday at 6 on TV Guide Network.

"True Blood" Eric proceeds with caution in his quest for revenge; Jessica and Hoyt's romance intensifies; Bill's attempt to win back Sookie's trust backfires; Arlene's future depends on divine intervention; Jason struggles to understand Crystal's revelation; Lafayette receives a rude welcome back to reality after a "V" trip. Sunday at 9 on HBO.

Top Movies of 2009

Alright, guys, the books are finally closed on the 2009 box office. Thirty films passed the $100M mark. And now, I will count down the top grossing movies from the last year. Is you favorite on this list? Let's see?

30. "The Princess and the Frog" $104M
29. "Watchmen" $108M
28. "Couples Retreat" $109M
27. "It's Complicated" $113M
26. "District 9" $116M
25. "G-Force" $119M
24. "Inglourious Basterds" $121M
23. "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs" $125M
22. "Terminator Salvation" $125M
21. "Angels & Demons" $133M
20. "A Christmas Carol" $138M
19. "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" $146M
18. "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra" $150M
17. "Fast & Furious" $155M
16. "The Proposal" $164M
15. "2012" $166M
14. "Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian" $177M
13. "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" $180M
12. "Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs" $197M
11. "Monsters vs. Aliens" $198M
10. "Sherlock Holmes" $209M
9. "Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel" $220M
8. "The Blind Side" $256M
7. "Star Trek" $258M
6. "The Hangover" $277M
5. "Up" $293M
4. "The Twilight Saga: New Moon" $297M
3. "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" $302M
2. "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" $402M
1. "Avatar" $761M

TiVo Guide Week of August 16, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"The Big C" In the series opener, suburban Minneapolis wife and schoolteacher Cathy (Laura Linney), who is dying from skin cancer, begins to take charge of her life and live it up a little. She starts by building a pool in her tiny backyard, and tries to tell those close to her---a teen son, her estranged husband and a homeless brother---about her illness, but finds it difficult. Monday at 10:30 on Showtime.

"Big Lake" In the premiere of this comedy about a disgraced Wall Street whiz kid who slinks back to his parents' house, Josh Franklin (Chris Gethard) vows to recoup his father's squandered retirement fund with help from an old friend and a former teacher. Meanwhile, Josh discovers his younger brother is not the model child he appears to be. Horatio Sanz and Chris Parnell costar. Tuesday at 10 on Comedy Central.

"Hot in Cleveland" In the first-season finale, threats of a tornado cause the ladies to seek shelter in Elka's secret room in the cellar, but they're nearly blown away by what they find. Wednesday at 10 on TV Land.

SummerSlam results

Yeesh, what a rough night to be a WWE PPV predictor. I only managed to go 2-3 on the night. Keep in mind, I dumped the Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston match when it was called a no contest. Also, I didn't change my pick of The Nexus when Team WWE became Bret Hart, Chris Jericho, DANIEL BRYAN, Edge, John Cena, John Morrison & R-Truth. Big mistake. So, I gotta give props where they are due, and those would be to Kane and Big Show. But how about big F.U. to Sheamus; Darren Young, David Otunga, Heath Slater, Justin Gabriel, Michael Tarver, Skip Sheffield & Wade Barrett; and Alicia Fox for making me finish below .500? My record is now down to 256-226. I'm feeling a smidge nervous going into Night of Champions.

SummerSlam card and picks

WWE Championship Match
Sheamus (c) vs. Randy Orton

World Heavyweight Championship Match
Kane (c) vs. Rey Mysterio

Elimination Tag Team Match
Team WWE (John Cena, Bret Hart, Chris Jericho, Edge R-Truth and John Morrison) vs. The Nexus (Wade Barrett, Skip Sheffield, Michael Tarver, Heath Slater, Justin Gabriel, Darren Young and David Otunga)

Intercontinental Championship Match
Dolph Ziggler (c) vs. Kofi Kingston

3-on-1 Handicap Match
Big Show vs. The Straight Edge Society (CM Punk, Luke Gallows and Joey Mercury)

Divas Championship Match
Alicia Fox (c) vs. Melina

Well, I gotta say I've picked up some steam in making picks, but it's time for to really kick ass. SummerSlam is one of the most important WWE PPVs of the year, and I really don't want to blow this. Of course, with a record that currently stands at 254-223, I always want to get better. So for tonight's show, I am picking Sheamus; Kane; Darren Young, David Otunga, Heath Slater, Justin Gabriel, Michael Tarver, Skip Sheffield & Wade Barrett; Dolph Ziggler; Big Show; and Alicia Fox. And yes, I am going with The Nexus to win the 7-on-7 elimination tag team match with almost no exception. The only way I will switch my pick to Team WWE is if that seventh person winds up being Kane, Randy Orton, or Sheamus, but all of those guys are already booked for matches tonight, so I doubt it. Anyways, wish me luck.

Why you shouldn't see a Seltzer and Friedberg movie

1. They are the worst reviewed movies in history. "Date Movie," "Epic Movie," "Meet the Spartans," and "Disaster Movie" all scored 6% or less on RottenTomatoes.com. That should be the first red flag.

2. They treat us like idiots. "I AM IRON MAN!" "I AM BATMAN!" Really?! I would have never guessed. Oh, wait, there's this. "I'M KUNG FU PANDA!" Come on, everyone knows his real name by now (Po). Which takes me to point number 3.

3. THEY DON'T DO THE EFFING RESEARCH! How hard to they work? They're notorious for only watching the trailers the of the movies they are spoofing, not the movies themselves. This makes them look even stupider when their movie comes out.

4. Their movies don't age well. Does anybody remember Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez as a couple? No? Didn't think so. Or what about "I'm ******* Matt Damon?" Also, "Disaster Movie" parodied "The Love Guru" on the false hope that it was a hit. Instead, "The Love Guru," just like "Disaster Movie," was a huge flop, so the reference was lost on many people. Hell, I don't think many people remembered "The Love Guru" until the Razzie nominations came out.

5. What's a plot? All these movies are good for are pop culture references, crappy special effects, and elongated bodily function jokes. Is there a plot or any kind of character development? Nope.

6. Why are these guys in these movies? Why would talented actors like Alyson Hannigan, Fred Willard, David Carradine, Kal Penn, Anneliese van der Pol, and Ken Jeong fill in their free time with this rubbish? All those actors are capable of acting beyond crap like this.

7. Too soon. "Meet the Spartans" has a reference to the death of Anna Nicole Smith, and "Disaster Movie" has one for Heath Ledger. What's the over/under there will be a Michael Jackson reference in "Vampires Suck?"

8. Product placement galore. And these guys shouldn't even be able to use product placement. The budgets of their movies is so low, I don't think any company would want to invest money in having their product in a movie. Low budget comedy = likely flop.

Really, these guys are simply infuriating. With "Vampires Suck" coming out soon, I hope it bombs horribly. The sooner this movie dies, the sooner Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg get chased out of Hollywood. Let's make it happen.

TiVo Guide Week of August 9, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"Bachelor Pad" "The Bachelor" and "The Bachelorette" meet "Big Brother" in this elimination contest, in which 19 castoffs from the ABC dating games face weekly challenges while living under the same roof. In the opener, they move into the bachelor pad, where their first challenge---a game of Twister---awaits. Then, before the first elimination, there's a day-night group date. Chris Harrison and Melissa Rycroft are the hosts. Monday at 8 on ABC.

"Pretty Little Liars" The girls go on an upscale camping trip for a classmate's birthday party, and a text suggests that "A" may be in attendance as well. Meanwhile, the FBI comes to town after new evidence about Alison's case surfaces; and financial strains weigh on Ashley. Tuesday at 9 on ABC Family.

"Hard Knocks: Training Camp With the New York Jets" In the opener of the sixth season, Jets players and coaches arrive in Cortland, N.Y., and settle in to their new quarters before beginning two-a-day drills. Wednesday at 10 on HBO.

"Roast of David Hasselhoff" Seth MacFarlane hosts a salute to "Baywatch" star David Hasselhoff. Roasters include Pamela Anderson, Greg Giraldo, Hulk Hogan, Lisa Lampanelli, Jeffrey Ross, Jerry Springer and George Hamilton. Sunday at 10 on Comedy Central.

Once again, bored!

So I thought the reigning Princess of Pop would lighten things up. Enjoy!

Tivo Guide Week of August 2, 2010 *spoiler alert*

"Shark Bites: Adventures in Shark Week" "Late Late Show" host Craig Ferguson goes diving with sharks in the Bahamas. Wednesday at 10 on Discovery.

"Friday Night Lights" In the Season 4 finale, the Taylors host Thanksgiving dinner. Elsewhere, Eric advises Vince to act more selfishly; a visitor surprises Julie and Landry; Tim makes a tough call; and East Dillon shows support for the Lions. Friday at 8 on NBC.

"Army Wives" Dr. Jill Biden (as herself) visits the fort and discusses challenges faced by military families with a deployed relative; Denise is caught in the middle when her sisters come to visit and bicker throughout their stay; Trevor's unit runs into trouble; and Roland aids Chase as he attends therapy. Sunday at 10 on Lifetime.