"Glee" review

I wouldn't fancy myself a full-time Gleek, but the show has managed to earn a supporter in me. In case you were living under a rock, "Glee" aired its long-awaited "Brittany/Britney" episode, focusing on the ditzy cheerleader Brittany S. Pierce (say that middle initial and last name real fast, and you'll know what it sounds like) and set up as a Britney Spears episode. In this episode, however, her actress, Heather Morris, demonstrated she will no longer be known merely as one of Beyonce's back-up dancers. This was her breakout episode. And considering the fact she was singing for the first time, she really held her own against a cast of super-talented singers/dancers. First up was a performance of "I'm a Slave 4 U", where Brittany, under a dentist's anesthesia, writhed around in the costume that Britney performed that song in during the 2001 VMAs (yellow boa constrictor and all), shook it in a glittery skin-colored suit a la "Toxic", and danced in a classroom in the red catsuit from the "Oops!... I Did It Again" video. Hot! I mean, if you haven't seen the video, what the frak are you waiting for? Go! See it!

Our second performance saw the return of Brittany to the dentist's office with her slutty cheerleader partner in crime, Santana. As they both go under listening to their iPods, we earn the familiar opening of "Me Against the Music", the hit Britney duet with Madonna (another artist who has gotten her own "Glee" episode). Brittany played the part of the lovely Ms. Spears, while Santana provided the vocals for the Queen of Pop. I may be bold in saying this, but I think the "Glee" version of "Me Against the Music" may have actually topped the original. Your mileage may vary, and right now, so does mine, but judge for yourself. And what do we get to wrap this drug-induced musical fantasy? How about BRITNEY SPEARS HERSELF showing up, wearing Madonna's costume from the video, and she begins flirting with Brittany, who returns the favor. Thank you to all the writers who considered the feelings of perverts like myself, Victor, Ken, etc.

Next up was the show's resident superstar, Rachel, having to pay the dentist a visit herself for her own poor dental hygiene, just like Brittany (Santana merely went in for cosmetic purposes). Soon we get that very familiar scene of a class room, a foot tapping against the metal leg of a desk, a pencil rapping against a table, a clock ticking away the seconds until class is dismissed, and... DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN, BRITNEY SPEARS AS A TEACHER! I CAN DIE HAPPY NOW! The bell rings, and we get that all-too familiar opening beat that got me hooked on Britney almost 12 years ago (I can't believe it's been that long). What we get is Rachel Berry, dressed as a Catholic school girl, belting out the iconic tune of "...Baby One More Time". And we get to see her in the midriff-baring workout clothing ensemble that Britney sported in that video. Holy moly, see it now. Go, just do it. Now!

The next Britney track kicks off as Artie's trip to the dentist. We start with... HOLY **** ON A **** SANDWICH WITH **** ON TOP AND A SIDE HELPING OF ****! IT'S BRITNEY AS A CHEERLEADER! *THUD!* She's at the lockers talking with Brittany (more Les Yay ensues) and Tina when the wheelchair-bound Artie comes over to them. Britney chastices Tina for breaking up with Artie, and when Tina apologizes, Artie replies with, "And I'm stronger." Bet you know which Britney Spears song this leads up to. But in case you don't, it's Artie singing "Stronger" while he fantasies about making the football. Really stellar performance. Check it out. And by the way, despite the fact that Artie is confined to his wheelchair, he still makes the varsity football team as a battering ram, er, running back. According to the show, there's nothing illegal about using a player in a wheelchair on a football team in the state's high school athletic association's rulebook. No surprise. This show does take place in Ohio, the home of Buckeyes and other assorted nuts.

Our final Britney piece comes at the homecoming assembly, as the Glee Club embers and their teacher, Will, perform a rendition of "Toxic". Yes, I know, the song was referenced in Brittany's solo performance, but this is a different take on the song. The performance is more Broadway than Britney, but it works surprisingly well. And I mean that as a reviewer and a somebody who noticed what was happening in canon, namely the students dancing in the gym bleachers to the song and the evil Sue Sylvester coming to regret her decision to put a stop to it. It has to be seen to be believed.

Our final song is the only exception to all the Britney Spears songs in the episode. Fittingly, that song is "The Only Exception" by Paramore, as Rachel sings it at the end for Finn. I won't give away too many details as to the song selection and what ensues, but you really gotta watch this episode to understand it.

So what did I think about "Brittany/Britney"? All the selections, Britney or not, were pitch perfect, and the Britney selections were all fitting tributes to pop's reigning princess, yet they managed to have their own unique spin. I don't want to give away too much about the various plots of the episode, but the way they selected the music seemed to revolve the various plots. And the way they portrayed Britney's past, good and bad, was done very tastefully. And what is a funny show without a couple of Britney Spears related memes being dropped ("Leave Brittany alone" and "It's Brittany, bitch!") and one not related to Britney ("Is this Heaven?"). So, all and all, I give this show a 9.9 out of 10. I know, I should have given it a perfect score, but what Sue discovered Jacob Ben Israel doing in the library was just downright disturbing, so there's your flaw. In the end, "Glee" did Britney Spears fans, and I assume the woman herself, very proud.