The 313 Second Movie Review: "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix"

Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the 313 Second Movie Review. In a vain effort to take my mind of WBC hunting (A PERFORMANCE OF "THE LARAMIE PROJECT" AND 5 MILITARY FUNERALS?! DAMMIT!), I'd thought I'd something a little more happy and fun. Of course, it really depends on whether or not you're one of those nuts who thinks reading books about witchcraft and wizardry is a damnable sin. Yeah, that right. The British/American movie "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" is my next choice for review. The film stars Daniel Radcliffe as Harry Potter, Rupert Grint as Ron Weasley, Emma Watson as Hermione Granger, Ralph Fiennes as Lord Voldemort, Michael Gambon as Albus Dumbledore, Gary Oldman as Sirius Black, Alan Rickman as Severus Snape, and Imelda Staunton as Dolores Umbridge. I trust you've all seen the previous "Harry Potter" films, so I see no need to hit rewind. Let's jump in. After the incident during the Tri-Wizard Tournament, Harry has a questionable aura floating over him at Hogwarts. The Ministry of Magic has repeatedly rebutted Harry's claims that Voldemort is back and ready wreck havoc yet again. It gets so far that Harry and his cruel, fat, Muggle cousin, are attacked by Dementors, the ghostly guards of the high-security prison Azakban (think Guantanamo, only with magical terrorists and without the alleged torture). Harry is successful in protecting himself and his cousin, but his use of magic in front of a Muggle gets him sent to the Ministry of Magic to decide his fate. Of course, the Ministry is too paranoid, inept, and incompentant because they're really questioning the allegations that He-Who-Musn't-Be-Named has resurfaced. Dumbledore steps in and vouches for Harry's innocence. Mission accomplished. Well, now, it's off to Hogwarts, and time to forget about the Ministry. *BUZZ* Wrong answer! The Ministry puts on of its own, Dolres Umbridge, to teach the once again vacant position of Professor of Defense Against the Dark Arts. Of course, this is to prevent any influence Dumbledore might use to show the students that Voldemort is back. So the Ministry forbids use of wands in DAtD classes and refrences schoolbooks (oh, yeah, like that will do any good). Umbridge's love of strict rule making and disdain for Harry is the last straw for The Boy Who Lived. He collects a group of students, including the jailbait-licious Hermione, his secret crush Cho, and oddball first year Luna Lovegood. Together, this large group of students forms the so-called Dumbledore's Army, a group dedicated to taking Hogwarts back from Umbridge, the snooping group of staff and Slytherins known as the Inquisitoral Squad, and the Ministry, in order to prepare for the inevitable showdown with Voldemort and his militia of Death Eaters. Well, I have to say, the "Harry Potter" series has yet to let me down, whether it be on paper or on film. Of course, there are some pitfalls. "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix," which so far has been the longest book in the series at 870 pages, was condensed to a 129 minute motion picture, so of all the minor characters, only Sirius Black got major screen time, while they robbed the always-terrific Professor McGonagall of quality use. And don't get me started on the subplots that got cut, especially the Quidditch match. However, the acting was beyond excellent, the plot pieced together very well, and the effects were breath-taking. Trust me, you will not wnat to miss the battle at the Ministry of Magic. If anything, it's another excellent version of "Harry Potter" in cinema form. If you wanna get amped up for the final book that is to be released this weekend but don't want to look at the previous books until then, this is what you should see.

And now for reports of sequals. As you can imagine, a long time ago, Warner Bros. gave the greenlight for a sixth and seventh edition to be released, and that reamins true. "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" is scheduled to be released in 2008. "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" will wrap up the film franchise with a slated release in 2010.

My time's up, you've been great. For the road: Bow Wow "Outta My System"