InThe313's Top 100 Songs of 2008

Hey, guys, welcome back. Now, here comes the way I close out every year. With my Top 100 Songs of the Year. Normally, this list draws a lot of heat my way, but I think I have the ranking that will please most everybody. And if it doesn't please you, sorry, that wasn't my goal. *sticks tongue out* However, feel free to leave positive feedback or CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. Also, everybody have a happy, safe, and blessed 2009. So why keep the anticipation building? Here are my Top 100 Songs of 2008.

100. Gavin Rossadale "Love Remains the Same"
99. Jesse McCartney "It's Over"
98. Enur featuring Natasja "Calabria 2008"
97. Maroon 5 "Won't Go Home Without You"
96. Nickelback "Gotta Be Somebody"
95. Matchbox Twenty "How Far We've Come"
94. 50 Cent featuring Justin Timberlake & Timbaland "Ayo Technology"
93. David Cook "The Time of My Life"
92. Soulja Boy Tell 'Em "Crank That (Soulja Boy)"
91. Snoop Dogg "Sensual Seduction"
90. Three 6 Mafia featuring Project Pat, Young D & Superpower "Lolli Lolli (Pop That Body)"
89. Miley Cyrus "7 Things"
88. Mariah Carey "Bye Bye"
87. Cherish featuring Yung Joc "Killa"
86. Britney Spears "Piece of Me"
85. Kanye West featuring T-Pain "Good Life"
84. Ne-Yo "Miss Independent"
83. Plies featuring Akon "Hypnotized"
82. Daughtry "What About Now"
81. New Kids on the Block "Summertime"
80. Britney Spears "Break the Ice"
79. Boys Like Girls "Thunder"
78. Paramore "That's What You Get"
77. Britney Spears "Womanizer"
76. Taylor Swift "Our Song"
75. Plies featuring Ne-Yo "Bust It Baby Part 2"
74. Good Charlotte "I Don't Want to Be in Love (Dance Floor Anthem)"
73. Jonas Brothers "When You Look Me in the Eyes"
72. Shontelle "T-Shirt"
71. Lupe Fiasco featuring Matthew Santos "Superstar"
70. Boys Like Girls "Hero/Heroine"
69. Christina Aguilera "Keeps Gettin' Better"
68. Santana featuring Chad Kroeger "Into the Night"
67. Kanye West "Stronger"
66. Timbaland featuring Keri Hilson "The Way I Are"
65. Jonas Brothers "Burnin' Up"
64. M.I.A. "Paper Planes"
63. Lifehouse "Whatever It Takes"
62. Jason Mraz "I'm Yours"
61. Baby Bash featuring T-Pain "Cyclone"
60. Daughtry "Over You"
59. Saving Abel "Addicted"
58. David Archuleta "Crush"
57. Kevin Rudolf featuring Lil Wayne "Let It Rock"
56. Paramore "Misery Business"
55. Flyleaf "All Around Me"
54. Estelle featuring Kanye West "American Boy"
53. Daughtry "Feels Like Tonight"
52. T.I. "Whatever You Like"
51. Flo Rida featuring Will.I.Am "In the Ayer"
50. Coldplay "Viva la Vida"
49. Natasha Bedingfield featuring Sean Kingston "Love like This"
48. Wyclef Jean featuring Akon, Lil Wayne & Niia "Sweetest Girl (Dollar Bill)"
47. Linkin Park "Shadow of the Day"
46. Gavin DeGraw "In Love with a Girl"
45. Pussycat Dolls "When I Grow Up"
44. Three Days Grace "Never Too Late"
43. Colby O'Donis featuring Akon "What You Got"
42. 3 Doors Down "It's Not My Time"
41. Mariah Carey "Touch My Body"
40. Colbie Caillat "Realize"
39. Katy Perry "Hot N Cold"
38. Madonna featuring Justin Timberlake "4 Minutes"
37. Colbie Caillat "Bubbly"
36. Kid Rock "All Summer Long"
35. Taylor Swift "Teardrops on My Guitar"
34. Rihanna featuring Ne-Yo "Hate That I Love You"
33. Lil Wayne featuring Static Major "Lollipop"
32. Danity Kane "Damaged"
31. Sean Kingston "Take You There"
30. Chris Brown featuring T-Pain "Kiss Kiss"
29. Finger Eleven "Paralyzer"
28. Pink "So What"
27. Jordin Sparks "One Step at a Time"
26. Secondhand Serenade "Fall for You"
25. Leona Lewis "Better In Time"
24. Kardinal Offishall featuring Akon "Dangerous"
23. Ray J & Yung Berg "Sexy Can I"
22. Jordin Sparks "Tattoo"
21. Rihanna "Don't Stop the Music"
20. Buckcherry "Sorry"
19. OneRepublic "Stop and Stare"
18. Metro Station "Shake It"
17. Natasha Bedingfield "Pocketful of Sunshine"
16. Katy Perry "I Kissed a Girl"
15. Miley Cyrus "See You Again"
14. Ne-Yo "Closer"
13. Usher featuring Young Jeezy "Love in This Club"
12. Fergie "Clumsy"
11. Rihanna "Disturbia"
10. Chris Brown "With You"
9. Sara Barellis "Love Song"
8. Alicia Keys "No One"
7. Jordin Sparks duet with Chris Brown "No Air"
6. Rihanna "Take a Bow"
5. Chris Brown "Forever"
4. Timbaland featuring OneRepublic "Apologize"
3. Leona Lewis "Bleeding Love"
2. Jesse McCartney "Leavin'"
1. Flo Rida featuring T-Pain "Low"

WILF Wednesday Closes Out 2008 with a Bang

How's it going, everybody? Tom back again, and what better way to shut the door on 2008 than with a rare two-post day? Tonight, it's back. That's right. My Top 100 Songs of the Year. But that's for later. Right now, I have to pay attention to WILF Wednesday. Thanks to theassman345xxxo for making this video. And unfortunately, I have to remind you all that while this video is not pornographic, viewer discretion is advised (stupid YouTube flaggers). Alright, on with the action. Now, I do not discriminate against women, homewreckers or not. Quite frankly, I don't care if this woman can tear apart a marriage. Sorry, Jen, but I can still book you that "Celebrity Deathmatch" if you want it. Anyways, to prevent myself from saying something I'll regret later, I'll keep this mini-bio short, sweet, and to the point. In 1982, she started her acting career in "Lookin' to Get Out" alongside her legendary father, Jon Voight. She didn't start acting full-time until 1993 in "Cyborg 2" (WTF?). She landed her first major role in the 1995 film "Hackers." Her roles began getting more critical acclaim with biographical films like "George Wallace" and "Gia," and then she landed an Oscar for "Girl, Interrupted." Since then, the glass ceiling has broken for this full-lipped hottie. She landed international fame when she was cast as the titular character in "Lara Croft: Tomb Raider." She's seen more than her fair share of commercial successes since then (i.e., "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" and "Kung Fu Panda"). And I ain't gonna lie. This woman, love her or not, has excellent breasts and an ass worthy of a paddle. She's hot. She's sexy. She's erotic. She's talented. She's a three-time Golden Globe winner. She's an Academy Award winner. She's Angelina Jolie.

TiVo Guide Week of December 29, 2008 *spoiler alert*

"Le Cirque: A Table in Heaven" This savory portrait of the New York City restaurant Le Cirque chronicles its 2004 closing and rebirth in 2006, and takes a candid look at the landmark eatery's frequently tense family dynamics between owner Sirio Maccioni and his three sons, who try to convince their father to update its old-fashioned style. Directed by Andrew Rossi. Monday at 8 on HBO.

"Bromance" The series opens as Brody Jenner's introduced to nine guys who will be competing to be part of his entourage. Monday at 9 on MTV.

"The City" In the series opener, Whitney Port arrives in New York City and begins working for iconic fashion designer Diane von Furstenberg. Monday at 10 on MTV.

"Happy New Year, Charlie Brown" Charlie Brown rings in 1986 at a party with a thick book: Tolstoy's “War and Peace,” which he has to read over the holidays. Still, Charlie takes part in some of the festivities before he settles down to read---only to miss the evening's surprise. Tuesday at 8 on ABC.

"Kennedy Center Honors" Morgan Freeman, George Jones, Barbra Streisand, Twyla Tharp, Pete Townshend and Roger Daltrey are the honorees at the 31st annual celebration, hosted by Caroline Kennedy. Among those appearing: Beyoncé; Jack Black; Garth Brooks; Glenn Close; Clint Eastwood; Dave Grohl; Alan Jackson; B.B. King; Shelby Lynne; Idina Menzel; Ne-Yo; Kelli O'Hara; Brad Paisley; Queen Latifah; Joss Stone; Rob Thomas; Lily Tomlin; Randy Travis; and Denzel Washington. Tuesday at 9 on CBS.

"According to Jim" A guys' weekend in the woods for Jim and Andy turns sour when the latter's fiancée calls off their engagement. It then turns shocking when they discover her ex-husband at the same cabin. Tuesday at 9:30 on ABC.

"Spectacle" Legendary crooner Tony Bennett performs and is interviewed by host Elvis Costello. Wednesday at 9 on Sundance.

"Entourage" In the fifth-season premiere, Eric and Ari deal with the fallout from "Medellin"'s wretched reviews while Vince and Turtle lay low in an undisclosed tropical paradise, and Drama continues his long-distance romance with Jacqueline, but turns into a diva during a "Five Towns" photo shoot. Wednesday at 10 on HBO.

"Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve With Ryan Seacrest" Dick Clark and Ryan Seacrest ring in the New Year with the countdown from Times Square in New York City. Fergie hosts from Hollywood and Kellie Pickler reports from the streets of New York. Among those scheduled to perform: the Jonas Brothers; the Pussycat Dolls; Ne-Yo; Jesse McCartney; Natasha Bedingfield; Fall Out Boy; Solange; and Robin Thicke. Wednesday at 11:30 on ABC.

"Twilight Zone" Howard Morris is a timid bookkeeper who acquires a brass lamp that houses genie Jack Albertson, whose offer of a single wish prompts fantasies for the bookkeeper. Ann: Patricia Barry. Watson: Loring Smith. Starlet: Joyce Jameson. Roger: Mark Miller. Salesman: James Millhollin. Sam: Bob Hastings. Clerk: Robert Ball. Thursday at 6 on Sci Fi.

"Tournament of Roses Parade" Cloris Leachman serves as grand marshal for the 120th annual procession through Pasadena, Cal. The parade, themed "Hats Off to Entertainment," features marching bands, floral floats and equestrian units. Arcadia, Cal., student Courtney Lee is this year's Rose Queen. Thursday at 11 on ABC.

"Tournament of Roses Parade" Cloris Leachman serves as grand marshal for the 120th annual procession through Pasadena, Cal. The parade, themed "Hats Off to Entertainment," features marching bands, floral floats and equestrian units. Arcadia, Cal., student Courtney Lee is this year's Rose Queen. Thursday at 11 on NBC.

"Tournament of Roses Parade" Cloris Leachman serves as grand marshal for the 120th annual procession through Pasadena, Cal. The parade, themed "Hats Off to Entertainment," features marching bands, floral floats and equestrian units. Arcadia, Cal., student Courtney Lee is this year's Rose Queen. Thursday at 11 on Home & Garden.

"Tournament of Roses Parade" Cloris Leachman serves as grand marshal for the 120th annual procession through Pasadena, Cal. The parade, themed "Hats Off to Entertainment," features marching bands, floral floats and equestrian units. Arcadia, Cal., student Courtney Lee is this year's Rose Queen. Thursday at 11 on Travel.

"Dear Genevieve" A great room is organized to become a more functional space in the premiere episode of this home-design series. Thursday at 1 on Home & Garden.

"Lipstick Jungle" Victory plans a proposal to Joe; Wendy is unhappy that Shane is still thinking about going on tour with Natasha Bedingfield; and Nico bonds with Griffin over problems at work. Friday at 9 on NBC.

"Stargate Atlantis" Detective John Sheppard investigates murders in Las Vegas linked to an unusual man with superhuman abilities. Steve Schirripa and Frank Vincent of "The Sopranos" fame guest star. Friday at 9 on Sci Fi.

"100 Greatest Hard Rock Songs" The conclusion of a five-part countdown of the Top 100 hard-rock songs. Friday at 10 on VH1.

"iCarly" Sam overhears Freddie make a confession that he's never been kissed, and she reveals this secret on Carly's Web show. After Freddie is mocked at school because of this, a regretful Sam exposes a secret about herself. Saturday at 8 on Nickelodeon.

"True Jackson, VP" When Lulu needs a dress for a school dance, True unknowingly lends her one that is a prototype. True also gets Jimmy's band a gig at the dance and receives a meaningful thank-you kiss from Jimmy in return. Saturday at 8:30 on Nickelodeon.

"Nanny Express" A spunky nanny (Vanessa Marcil) tries to win over her rebellious charges, who are coping with the death of their mother. Romance soon blooms between the nanny and the kids' father (Brennan Elliott), but the relationship could stall if the kids object. Dean Stockwell and Stacy Keach also star. Saturday at 9 on Hallmark.

"Real World Secrets Revealed" A behind-the-scenes look at the reality show's first 20 seasons. Sunday at 11 on MTV.

"Big Love" In the Season 2 opener, Barb withdraws from the family in the wake of the Mother of the Year scandal, while Bill tirelessly investigates the source of the allegations. Meanwhile, Roman turns up the heat on Wanda at Juniper Creek, and Sarah pseudonymously renounces her polygamist background to an ex-Mormon support group. Sunday at 7 on HBO.

"Superstars of Dance" The premiere episode of this competition series, in which performers from Argentina, Australia, China, India, Ireland, Russia, South Africa and the United States showcase their native dance styles. Michael Flatley and Susie Castillo host. Sunday at 9 on NBC.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Lions vs. Packers game

The Hero: Aaron Rodgers. Green Bay's quarterback hit throws long and short against the Lions' flimsy pass defense, including the key bomb to Donald Driver after Detroit made things close.
The Goat: Kevin Smith. The rookie running back was flagged for shoving a ball into a Green Bay player's face on the sideline. The 15-yard penalty pushed the Lions out of field goal range on their final drive.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Michigan State vs. Oakland game

The Hero: Kalin Lucas. The MSU guard headed into halftime with 12 points and four assists, keying the explosive 18-2 run to pull away.
The Goat: OU's 3-pt shooting. The Golden Grizzlies hit just one three-pointer out of their first six after the half.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Florida Atlantic vs. Central Michigan game

The Hero: Rusty Smith. The FAU quarterback had much better return trip to Michigan: 20-for-35 for 306 yards and two TDs.
The Goat: Butch Jones. Went for it on fourth down from the FAU 6 with 5:15 left in the fourth quarter instead of kicking a field goal.

WILF Wednesday Gets a Little Bouncy

Hello everybody. Welcome back to WILF Wednesday. I am Tom, as you all know. This edition of WILF Wednesday is my way of saying Merry Christmas (tomorrow), Happy Hanukkah (going on), Happy Kwanzaa (Friday), and Happy Ramadan (I think it's already over, but this is still for my Islamic readers). Thanks to theassman345xxxo for wrapping up this present and tying a nice bow on it. However, though it isn't ponographic, viewer discretion is advised. Now get the hell out of here, you moral Grinch! Anyways, this lovely lady will win over many hearts. This woman was told many times she was too small to be a professional wrestler. Maybe that's why she toiled for so long in the minor leagues and TNA (ZING!). After years of competiting in the farm systems, she finally got called up to the WWE. She debuted as Trish Stratus' biggest fan, helping and accidentally hurting Trish and Ashley in their matches. Her fandom of Trish soon became psychotic, leading up to a match between the two at WrestleMania 22, where this week's woman won her first WWE Championship. After winning said title, she effectively starting ripping through the Women's Division, causing numerous injuries to Trish, Ashley, and Beth Phoenix. Basically anybody who crossed this psycho found themselves on the self. After about five months, she turned face again when she lost the title to Lita. After Trish retired as WWE Women's Champion, this week's hottie and Lita clashed for two months for the championship, Lita getting their first, followed by this week's woman grabbing it in Lita's retirement match at Survivor Series in 2006. Afterwards, our girl competed in a physical feud against Victoria that cemented her spot as a top Diva. Next was a hardcore rivalry with Melina, and in the end, the Latina Diva won. This week's woman did regain the Women's Championship under weird circumstances at a house show in Paris, but lost it to Melina again a few minutes later. Most of 2007 was fighting in match-ups with Victoria, Melina, and Jillian as she worked her way back to the title. Soon, she got involved in a frustrating feud with the much more powerful Beth, who dominated Mickie for months. Finally, in April, she finally cracked the Glamazon and joined Hall of Famer Fabulous Moolah and future Hall of Famer Lita for second with 4 WWE Women's Championships (trails only Trish, who had 7 reigns). Her feud carried over for a few months and helped turn Melina face, then moved into a feud with Katie Lea Burchill. All the while, this helped create a fascinating backstage romance with John Cena until Cena hurt his neck, leading many to wonder if the releationship was for real or not. Eventually, she lost her title to Beth again, but she has instrumental in other Diva feuds assisting former rivals like Candice, Kelly Kelly, and Melina. I have little doubt she will grab that elusive fifth WWE Women's Championship soon enough. But how about this girl's body? At 5'4", I wouldn't expect such a great set of boobs and a spankable ass to fit in that body, but she gets it done. She's hot. She's athletic. She's bouncy. She's fun. She's not afraid to kiss anybody on TV, male or female. She's destined for greatness. She's Mickie James.

TiVo Guide Week of December 22, 2008 *spoiler alert*

"Prison Break" While Linc and his new colleagues are in hot pursuit of Scylla in Miami, Michael is at a remote mountain cabin in California, where he learns something new about the Company. He's also guided through childhood memories by a Company psychiatrist (John Getz). Meanwhile, Sara is waiting for news of Michael in a luxury hotel, and she's not enjoying the luxury. Christina: Kathleen Quinlan. Monday at 9 on Fox.

"The Life a House Built: The 25th Anniversary of the Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter Work Project" An examination of Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter's 25-year commitment to Habitat for Humanity, featuring interviews with the former president and first lady. Included: the couple's history with the group; their May 2008 sojourn to the Gulf Coast to help build and restore homes for Katrina victims; the impact that the Carters and their annual work project have had on both a personal and global scale. Kevin O'Connor ("This Old House") hosts. Monday at 9 on PBS.

"The Soup Presents" Top 2008 entertainment stories are the focus, including news about Miley Cyrus, the Jonas Brothers, Britney Spears, David and Victoria Beckham, and Madonna and Guy Ritchie. Monday at 10 on E!

"A Home for the Holidays" The 10th annual event to raise awareness of adoption. Performers include Faith Hill, Tim McGraw, Melissa Etheridge, Jamie Foxx and Gavin Rossdale. Also appearing are Kristin Chenoweth, Patricia Heaton, Rene Russo and Martin Short. Tuesday at 8 on CBS.

"Rediscovered" Wannabe stars finally get their moment in the spotlight years after auditioning for casting director Matt Casella, who discovered Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake, Christina Aguilera and JC Chasez as kids. Hosted by Donny and Marie Osmond, the program features the original taped auditions of five aspiring child stars, who then perform in the present day in front of a live audience. Tuesday at 9 on ABC.

"Fringe" Dangerous consequences of a man's peculiar ability to harness electricity draw the attention of Olivia, Peter and Dr. Bishop, whose unorthodox methods extend to including the use of homing pigeons to aid their investigation. Tuesday at 9:01 on Fox.

"Bah, Humduck! A Looney Tunes Christmas" Ivan Reitman directs this animated variation on the Dickens classic, with Daffy Duck as the Scrooge-like owner of a department-store chain who learns a lesson about the meaning of Christmas from Bugs Bunny, Porky Pig's daughter and the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future (played by Granny, Tweety, Yosemite Sam and Taz). Wednesday at 12 on Cartoon.

"Christmas With the Mormon Tabernacle Choir Featuring the King's Singers" The King's Singers, a British vocal ensemble, join the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and Orchestra at Temple Square for a concert of holiday favorites, including "Rejoice and Be Merry," "Little Drummer Boy," "O Holy Night" and "The Twelve Days of Christmas." Also on the docket: "The First Noel," "Deck the Halls," "One December, Bright and Clear," "What Child Is This?" and "Angels from the Realms of Glory." From Salt Lake City. Wednesday at 8 on PBS.

"Toby Keith Classic Christmas" Toby Keith performs holiday classics, including “Winter Wonderland,” “I'll Be Home for Christmas,” “Little Drummer Boy” and “The First Noel.” Also: Keith is joined on stage by Jewel for “The Christmas Song” and “Go Tell It on the Mountain.” Wednesday at 11 on CMT.

"Deal or No Deal" 'Tis the season for a potential million-dollar Christmas. In holiday-themed games, a family from California steps up to play, as does a newly married war hero from Oregon. Thursday at 8 on NBC.

"Hallmark Heroes" Regis Philbin hosts the second annual event, which honors four humanitarians with contributions to their causes. Also: Jane Seymour discusses her charitable endeavors. Thursday at 8 on Hallmark.

"General Hospital: The Most of Christmas Past Marathon" A block of three holiday-themed episodes from years past begins with Sonny selling Christmas trees while Jax spends quality holiday time with Brenda, and Jason shares Christmas wishes with Robin and Lila. Thursday at 8 on SoapNet.

"NCIS" The decomposing body of a missing marine is found propped up in a chair in an abandoned house, where it was placed after being exhumed from the backyard. Rick Carvell: Matt Winston. Rebecca Kemp: Elisa Donovan. Siri Albert: Rachel Boston. Capt. Stengel: Derek Webster. Bob Whitehead: Tom Kiesche. Friday at 6 on USA.

"Biography" A popular documentary series profiling an eclectic range of notables, with each episode focusing on one figure. Based on a half-hour syndicated program that ran from 1961-64 and in 1979, the concept was successfully revived as an hourlong show with Peter Graves as host in 1987. Well-established and a franchise series for A&E by 1994, it later spun off the Biography Channel. Friday at 2 on BIO.

"CMT Online Awards" Fan-voted awards honoring CMT stars and videos. Taylor Swift, Jessica Simpson, Trace Adkins, Larry the Cable Guy and Hulk Hogan are slated to appear. Friday at 3:30 on CMT.

"Olympics: Opening Ceremony" An encore presentation of the Opening Ceremony of the 2008 Games in Beijing. The spectacular event featured thousands of drummers, terracotta soldiers, acrobats and fireworks. Also: a look back at the highlights of the Games, including Michael Phelps and his record-setting performances. Saturday at 8 on NBC.

"A Kiss at Midnight" A woman (Faith Ford) who runs a dating service registers with a rival Internet matchmaker to prove her business is better, but ends up being successfully matched with the site's owner (Cameron Daddo). Dyan Cannon and Hal Linden also star. Saturday at 9 on Hallmark.

"The Sound of Music" Oscar-winning adaptation (restored to its original length) of the classic Rodgers and Hammerstein musical stage hit. Maria: Julie Andrews. Baron von Trapp: Christopher Plummer. The Baroness: Eleanor Parker. Max: Richard Haydn. Liesl: Charmian Carr. Sunday at 7 on ABC.

"Million Dollar Password" Betty White; Adam Carolla. Sunday at 8 on CBS.

"Dog Whisperer" Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz hope Cesar can help tame their beloved English bulldog, Hemingway, whose aggression has escalated in recent months with the arrival of a new dog named Rigby. Also: A retriever's aggression around food is addressed. Sunday at 8 on National Geographic.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Saints vs. Lions game

The Hero: Drew Brees. He passed for 351 yards and two TDs as he chases Dan Marino's season-yardage record.
The Goat: Mr. Ford. He made a bad day worse by announcing he didn't plan the housecleaning desperate fans want.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Michigan State vs. Texas game

The Hero: Durrell Summers. In the final 4:02, Summers scored eight points on two three-pointers and two free throws and added two rebounds.
The Goat: A.J. Abrams. The Texas guard averages 20.9 points, but MSU held him to 8. He was 0-for-4 from three-point range.

From the Michigan vs. Oakland game

The Hero: Laval Lucas-Perry. After a flurry of counter-punches in the first six minutes, Lucas-Perry enetered, hit three triples during an 18-0 U-M run and helped build a big lead. His family provided the shirt of the day: "LL Cool P" on the front and "Lucas-Perry, Fear the Hyphen, 31" on the back.
The Goat: Two-pointers. Michigan and Oakland love the long-range shot. Michigan took 29 threes, hitting 13 (44.8%). Oakland launched 24, hitting 8 (33%).

WILF Wednesday is Bootylicious

Hello, everybody. Welcome back once more to WILF Wednesday. I need to give credit where credit is due, and that is to theassman345xxxo. This week, I've got quite the treat for everybody. If you wanna look up the definition of success, you'll find this girl's picture next to the word. She is one of the most accomplished musicians in the last ten years, selling over 50 million albums worldwide. And all of those aren't even solo albums. She started out at a young age in this group called Destiny's Child. During the late '90's and the early part of this decade, the group went through more changes than the Lions starting quaterback position this season. Eventually, the group found a lineup that would stick, but even during the lineup shuffles, the group was criticially acclaimed and were popular worldwide for their independent woman style. Wehn the group took a hiatus, this member went to be the most successful, selling millions and flooding the airwaves with her songs. Not to mention she began her attempt at acting, which led up to critically-acclaimed roles in "Austin Powers in Goldmember" and "Dreamgirls." Destiny's Child came back for one last album before they split the girls decided to all go solo in 2005. So far, she's still the most successful woman in the group, still selling millions of albums, performing with the likes of Shakira and her husband, Jay-Z. Her acting career is still going strong. She's tried her hand at fashion. In 2007, she shocked the world by becoming only the second African-American woman, first non-model, and first non-athlete woman to grace the cover of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue. What can I say? When you have great breasts like those, and an ass that inspired a word that is now of the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, you can practically get away with anything. She's hot. She's multi-talented. She's entertaining. She's a two-time BRIT Award winner. She's an ten-time Grammy Award winner. She's an Ivor Novello Award winner. She's Beyonce Knowles.

TiVo Guide Week of December 15, 2008 *spoiler alert*

"Heroes" Peter and Nathan face off after the battle with their father; Sylar detains Claire, Noah, Meredith and Angela at Primatech, and Mohinder may hold the key to rescuing Hiro. Monday at 9 on NBC.

"Intervention" Alcoholism is the subject. Monday at 9 on A&E.

"Worst Week" Sam helps Dick choose the perfect Christmas gift for Angela after discovering he gets her the same thing every year. But Sam's attempt to deliver the present doesn't bring Dick any tidings of comfort or joy. Monday at 9:31 on CBS.

"Biggest Loser: Families" The winner is revealed in the sixth-season finale. Also: The eliminated players return for a final weigh-in and compete for the at-home $100,000 prize; and the third finalist chosen by viewers is announced. Tuesday at 8 on NBC.

"According to Jim" Faced with the difficult task of buying Christmas presents for five kids, Jim tries to earn extra money by getting the twins cast in a film starring Steve Guttenberg (who plays himself), though the idea of the kids becoming movie stars is a flop with Cheryl. Tuesday at 9 on ABC.

"Momma's Boys" Three bachelors and their mothers meet 32 single women in the premiere episode of this dating show. The group settle into their cliff-side home, where they'll all live together, but an argument between one mom and a contestant quickly causes tension. Tuesday at 10 on NBC.

"Muppets Christmas: Letters to Santa" Song, dance, comedy and celeb guest turns intertwine in a holiday romp featuring the Muppets, who unwittingly prevent three letters from reaching Santa Claus. Kermit and his friends attempt to deliver the messages to the jolly fellow in an odyssey that involves a lonely girl, a taxi driver (Whoopi Goldberg), an amiable ticket agent (Uma Thurman) and a bitter security guard (Nathan Lane). Also appearing: Jane Krakowski, Jesse L. Martin, Petra Nemcova and Steve Schirripa. Wednesday at 8 on NBC.

"Spectacle" Former president Bill Clinton discusses his early career aspirations as a jazz saxophonist and how music has helped shape his life. Elvis Costello hosts. Wednesday at 9 on Sundance.

"Top Chef: New York" A holiday-themed outing is on the menu, with domestic guru Martha Stewart overseeing the quickfire challenge. Then, the cooks cater a Christmas cocktail party hosted by actress and guest judge Natasha Richardson, with proceeds benefiting AIDS research. Wednesday at 10 on Bravo.

"Ugly Betty" New Mode editor Wilhelmina tries to entice Betty to take a job as her assistant; Daniel's desire to keep his son in the U.S. hits a snag in the form of a custody battle; Christina finds reason to be wary of her estranged husband's motives. Thursday at 8 on ABC.

"Faith Hill, Joy to the World: A Soundstage Special Event" Faith Hill, accompanied by an orchestra and choir, performs selections from her 2008 "Joy to the World" Christmas album. Included: "A Baby Changes Everything," "Holly, Jolly Christmas," "Joy to the World!" "Little Drummer Boy," "O Come, All Ye Faithful," "Santa Claus Is Coming to Town" and "Silent Night." Thursday at 10 on PBS.

"Cathouse: Three Ring Circus" Another visit to the Moonlite Bunny Ranch, a Nevada brothel, includes a customer in a clown suit, employee superstitions and a wild birthday party. Thursday at 11 on HBO.

"Don't Forget the Lyrics!" Game-show host Chuck Woolery and Australian pop-music act Air Supply help two strangers compete together in a search for romance and a big payday. Friday at 9 on Fox.

"Whale Wars" In the Season 1 finale, the crew attacks a Japanese whaling ship again. After the battle, Watson claims to be injured and draws the media's attention to his cause. Friday at 9 on Animal Plan.

"Degrassi in Ecuador" Cast members travel to Ecuador to assist an indigenous community with health and sanitation issues and help build a school. Charlotte Arnold, Evan Williams, Sarah Barrable-Tishauer and Dalmar Abuzeid appear. Friday at 9 on The N.

"Christmas in Wonderland" A family's holiday wishes come true when the two children find a bag of money and spend it on presents, but then they discover it is fake and the counterfeiters want it back. Patrick Swayze, Chris Kattan, Tim Curry. Directed by James Orr, who cowrote the script with Wanda Birdsong Shope and Jim Cruickshank. Saturday at 8 on ABC Family.

"Our First Christmas" A newly blended family clash over conflicting Christmas traditions, and none of the kids are interested in compromising. Dixie Carter, John Ratzenberger, Julie Warner and Steven Eckholdt star. Directed by Armand Mastroianni. Saturday at 9 on Hallmark.

"A Very Merry Daughter of the Bride" A wedding planner (Joanna Garcia) sets out to stop her widowed mother's hasty romance and impending wedding. But she soon finds herself falling in love with a man (Luke Perry) just as quickly as her mother did. Saturday at 9 on Lifetime.

"Million Dollar Password" Julie Chen; Phil Keoghan. Sunday at 8 on CBS.

"Brotherhood" With Donatello in critical condition, Tommy appears to be next in line for Speaker of the House, which leads Freddie Cork to try to get on his good graces; Italian mobsters, the state police and the Feds are on Michael's trail while he tries to track down Colin. Sunday at 8 on Showtime.

"Summer Heights High" Ja'mie hatches a fund-raising scheme to make up for disappointing ticket sales for the Year 11 formal; Mr. G resorts to drastic measures when he feels his authority is undermined; and Jonah returns from suspension without much change in his behavior. Sunday at 10:30 on HBO.

Armageddon results

Oh crap! Just when I thought I would finally turn things around, the WWE has to go and screw me over. I was only 3-4 at Armageddon last night, dropping my record to 182-145. So for Jeff Hardy; Batista; and Kelly Kelly, Maria, Michelle McCool & Mickie James, thanks for preventing a disaster worse than Chernobyl. For Chris Jericho, Rey Mysterio, Matt Hardy, and Mark Henry, **** you with a chainsaw! But how great is it now that both Hardy brothers are now world champions. I knew one day these two would climb to the top of the mountain, and now they are standing together alongside John Cena. In fact, I think I'll leave you with a couple of bonus videos. Matt winning the ECW Championship at Unforgiven in September, and Jeff winning the WWE Championship last night.


By the way, anybody else find Matt Striker's overprotection of his Slammy last night funny?

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Lions vs. Colts game

The Hero: Dallas Clark. He was Peyton Manning's go-to guy, with 12 catches - a Colts record for tight ends - for 142 yards and a touchdown.
The Goats: Pass defense. Not only was it another game without a pick, the Lions gave up 87 yards in the air and just the final 1 on the ground on the Colts' 88-yard drive for the go-ahead TD.

Armageddon card & picks

Singles match for the World Heavyweight Championship
John Cena (c) vs. Chris Jericho

Triple Threat match for the WWE Championship
Edge (c) vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Triple H

Singles match
Batista vs. Randy Orton

Singles match for a future WWE Intercontinental Championship match
CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Singles match
Matt Hardy vs. Valdimir Kozlov

Belfast Brawl
Mark Henry vs. Finlay

Eight-Diva Santa's Little Helper match
Maria, Kelly Kelly, Mickie James and Michelle McCool vs. Maryse, Jillian Hall, Victoria and Natalya

Lately, I've had a string of matches where I have only finished .500. Unless I need to toss a match, that's guarenteed not to happen tonight since we have seven matches on the card. But let's get me back on the winning side of the fence. Currently, I stand at 179-141. I shall improve on that record by picking Chris Jericho; Jeff Hardy; Batista; Rey Mysterio; Matt Hardy; Mark Henry; and Kelly Kelly, Maria, Michelle McCool & Mickie James. Wish me luck.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Eastern Michigan vs. Michigan game

The Heroes: Kelvin Johnson and Jevohn Shepherd. The pair combined for 24 first-half points, keeping the Wolverines close in the first 15 minutes, highlighted by Grady's three straight threes. Then, Shepherd put U-M ahead for good with an impressive dunk and long jumper.
The Goat: Eastern's defense. The Eagles knew their best chance was to keep U-M inside the arc and limited the Wolverines to one three in their first seven tries. After that, Michigan exploded, ending with a school-record 16 three-pointers.

From the Alcorn State vs. Michigan State game

The Hero: Chris Allen. Coming off the bench, MSU's sophomore guard scored 20 points on 7-for-9 shooting in 18 minutes to lead all players.
The Goat: Troy Jackson. Alcorn State's top scorer averaged 21.9 points entering Saturday, but netted only 15 - mostly late - on 6-for-17 shooting.

WILF Wednesday Gets Tropical

Hola, seniors and senoritas! This is your hombre, Tom, and we are back for yet another edition of WILF Wednesday. Credit as always to theassman345xxxo for making such great videos about the celebrity ass. Anyways, today, we have a real south of the equator treat for you. This week's WILF is living the high life, but life didn't start out that way. That's because she grew up in an improvished family in the streets of Salvador, Brazil, home to 2.95 million people, making it the third largest city in Brazil and eighth largest in Latin America. Believe it or not, this woman wasn't interested in modeling until a schoolmate entered a modeling contest and didn't want to go alone. No word on where the friend is, but our focus of the week sent in her picture and was chosen out of all the other girls in the competition. At 15, she was named by the Ford Modeling Agency as the Supermodel of Brazil, and a year later, was entered to represent her country in the Supermodel of the World competition. At 19, she moved to New York City and signed with Elite Modeling Agency. She landed in the pages of Vogue and Marie Claire. She worked fashion shows for designers like Vera Wang, Christian Lacroix, Emanuel Ungaro, Giorgio Armani, Fendi, Ralph Lauren, and Valentino. She even managed to become a GUESS? girl. Her resume grew with advertisements for Maybelline, bebe, Mossimo, Armani, Bulgari, De Beers, FCUK, Intimissi, Keds, Swatch, Versace, and BCBG. Her face graced the pages of Harper's Bazaar, ELLE, Vogue, GQ, Marie Claire, Arena, Cosmopolitan, and Esquire. The April 2006 cover of GQ with her on the cover was the magazine's top-selling issue that year. She appeared in the 2005 Pirelli Calendar. She even became a big name in Italy with her advertisments for Telecom Italia Mobile. 2008 brought her prosperity with articles and photographs in Esquire, Vanity Fair, and People, being named the hottest model according to Models.com, and becoming the spokeswoman for the Mexican department store chain Liverpool. As of 2007, she's the world's fourth highest supermodel. Of course, her best work is with the one good thing to come out of Columbus, Ohio, and that's Victoria's Secret. She signed with the company in 1999 and became one their world-famous Angels in 2000. As her popularity grew, she started opening the show, doing so in 2003, 2007, and 2008, which she also closed. In 2003, she appeared in the "Angel of Venice" commercial with a musical icon, Bob Dylan. Her Super Bowl XLII commercial was the most-watched ad of the game with 103.7 million viewers. She hosted "What Is Sexy?" on E! and did a July tour for the launch of the BioFit Uplift Bra, appearing in Long Island, Boston, and Miami Beach. She also was the spokeswoman for the Miracle Bra when it was relaunched last month. Her popularity allowed her to get into acting. She appeared in a series of short BMW movies with Clive Owen, Mickey Rourke, and Forrest Whittaker. In November 2007, she and her fellow angels appeared together on "How I Met Your Mother." This year, she played herself on her favorite TV series, "Ugly Betty." Not bad for a girl who lived in poverty during her childhood. And like so many other Brazilian women, she has excellent breasts and an ass that deserves attention. She's hot. She's coordinated. She's sexy. She's glamorous. She's the legendary Adriana Lima.

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TiVo Guide Week of December 8, 2008 *spoiler alert*

"Chuck" Chuck spies on Sarah and her date (Gary Cole) and has an Intersect flash about the mystery man. Elsewhere, Anna wants to move in with Morgan, who feels pressured to grow up. But despite help from Captain Awesome, Morgan's quest for maturity is derailed by something from his past. Monday at 8 on NBC.

"How I Met Your Mother" Ted and Barney pick a fight with guys sitting in their favorite booth in an attempt to change how their friends perceive them. Doug: Will Sasso. Monday at 8:30 on CBS.

"Boston Legal" Financial problems may force Crane Poole & Schmidt to be put up for sale in the series finale, which also finds Alan petitioning the Supreme Court for Denny's access to a non-FDA approved medicine, and Shirley and Carl planning their wedding. Monday at 9 on ABC.

"Super WHY!" Whyatt has an important question for Santa Claus, spurring the Super Readers to fly into "'Twas the Night Before Christmas." They learn about the jolly old elf's childhood and how to help spread the magic of the holiday. Tuesday at 10 on PBS.

"America's Funniest Home Videos" Holiday-themed blunders include a clumsy Santa Claus, a dog that steals a cat's treats, a little boy's unusual take on "Jingle Bell Rock," and a little girl who rejects her sister's help with "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer." Tuesday at 8 on ABC.

"House" A troubled teen collapses during her high-school Christmas program; Foreman and Thirteen learn more about each other as they work together on the Huntington's disease drug trial; House gives and receives holiday gifts, leading to team speculation; and Cuddy receives a gift as well. Janice: Lori Petty. Tuesday at 8 on Fox.

"Little Spirit: Christmas in New York" Animation and holiday cheer blend when an amiable cabbie (voice of Danny DeVito) relates the tale of a boy (voice of Michael Hall D'Addario), a new arrival in Manhattan who takes a magical odyssey to find his lost dog with help from a mystical creature. Lucy Liu, Freddy Rodriguez, Brian Williams and Brenda Song also lend their voices. Singer-songwriter Duncan Sheik provides the music. Wednesday at 8 on NBC.

"Whitney: From The Hills to The City" Before moving to New York City, Whitney Port looks back on her life in Los Angeles, from her internship at Teen Vogue to her work at People's Revolution. Included: a sneak peek at her upcoming reality series "The City." Wednesday at 10 on MTV.

"Dirty Sexy Money" Patrick invites Carmelita to his inauguration and faces a possible public accusation of murder if Chase makes good on his threats. Meanwhile, Jeremy figures out why Simon has a hold on Nola; Brian makes promises to God as Andrea's health suffers; and a dangerous intruder confronts Karen when she stops by Nick's place. Wednesday at 10:01 on ABC.

"CSI: Crime Scene Investigation" Grissom announces he is leaving CSI and it stuns his staff, but a murder that may be linked to an infamous serial killer commands everyone's attention. The latest victim's body is found dismembered in a trash bag along a creek. Evidence suggests the murder is connected to the so-called Dick and Jane Killer, who is now in jail. Grissom then attends a class taught by criminal pathologist Raymond Langston (Laurence Fishburne), hoping to gain insight into the case. Thursday at 9 on CBS.

"The Office" The staffers jingle all the way at a Moroccan-themed holiday bash, but tensions flare when Meredith's hair catches fire. Dwight's fired up as well: He becomes consumed with the hottest toy of the holiday season. Thursday at 9 on NBC.

"30 Rock" When her parents ditch her during the holidays, a lonely Liz devotes herself to a charity program. Meanwhile, Jack's highly anticipated holiday plans are scratched, and he takes out his frustrations on the crew. And the staffers must drop all their plans to produce a Christmas special. Elaine Stritch guest stars. Thursday at 9:31 on NBC.

"Greatest Holiday Moments: Songs of the Season Countdown" A countdown of classic and contemporary Christmas songs. Included: Bing Crosby's "White Christmas"; Gene Autry's "Frosty the Snowman"; John Lennon's "Happy Xmas (War Is Over)"; Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas Is You." Friday at 8 on NBC.

"12 Days of Redneck Christmas" A look at quirky Christmas traditions. Tom Arnold is the host. Friday at 9 on CMT.

"Starter Wife" In the season finale, Molly assesses her future with Zach during Lou's wedding. Elsewhere, Joan makes a confession, Rodney's relationship changes and Liz's life becomes turbulent. Friday at 10 on USA.

"Miser Brothers' Christmas" Santa takes out his new advanced-model sleigh, which North Wind secretly sabotaged, and gets caught in the feuding Miser Brothers' cross fire. Because Santa is injured, the Miser Brothers are sentenced to fill in for him, ruining North Wind's plan. Saturday at 8 on ABC Family.

"The Greatest Game Ever Played" A 50th-year celebration of the 1958 Colts-Giants NFL Championship Game. Restored and colorized game footage from Yankee Stadium is mixed with unique interviews featuring surviving players and their modern day counterparts with the Colts and Giants. Chris Berman hosts. Saturday at 9 on ESPN.

"Naked Brothers Band" Nat doesn't feel very merry at Christmastime thanks to Rosalina's increasingly less romantic letters, and his attitude may ruin the band's benefit concert. Meanwhile, Alex tries to beat the Timmerman brothers at creating the worst online Christmas video. Guest stars include Whoopi Goldberg, Natasha Bedingfield and Leon Thomas. Saturday at 9 on Nickelodeon.

"Survivor: Gabon---Earth's Last Eden" The final castaways are questioned by the jury, who then vote for the winner. Sunday at 8 on CBS.

"Snow 2 Brain Freeze" In this sequel to "Snow," Nick Snowden (Tom Cavanagh) gets hit on the head and forgets that he's Santa days before Christmas. As his wife (Ashley Williams) tries to help him remember, she asks for assistance from her ex-boyfriend, who only pretends to help her. The ex's real plan is to steal Nick's secrets. Buck: Patrick Fabian. Sunday at 8 on ABC Family.

"House of Saddam" Conclusion. The second half of a biopic of Iraqi president Saddam Hussein (Igal Naor) opens in 1995, when the failure to comply with U.N. inspections led to sanctions, and depicts his concealment from U.S. forces after the March 2003 invasion, which separated him from his sons, Uday and Qusay, who were killed in July. Mounir Margoum, Philip Arditti. Sunday at 9 on HBO.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Vikings vs. Lions game

The Hero: Adrian Peterson. He was caught for losses other times, but gained 79 yards on the Vikings' three second-half scoring drives.
The Goat: Rod Marinelli. In a low-scoring game, he passed up two field-goal attempts in the first half and failed both times on fourth down.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the North Carolina vs. Michigan State game

The Hero: Tyler Hansbrough. The reigning player of the year did play, and, unfortunately for MSU, played well, compiling 25 points and 11 rebounds.
The Goats: The Spartans in second half. A poor team effort all around let a 14-point halftime deficit fall into the 30s. MSU shot 19.4% in the half and scored only 24 points.

WILF Wednesday Brings You the Holy Grail of Asses

Hey, guys. Tom here. Yeah, I know I told you I remembered yesterday was WILF Wednesday, but I didn't post because I was too preoccupied with studying for a logic test. Now, I haven't forgotten to give you guys what you wanted. Thanks to theassman345xxxo for making another excellent video. Now, what is out there that this Latina hottie from the Bronx cannot do? She sells multi-platinum albums. She stars in hit films (and "Gigli"). She's a great record producer. She's a talented dancer. She's a successful fashion designer. She's a hell of a television producer. I swear to God, there is nothing this woman cannot accomplish. Her long-running resume speaks for itself. I don't care if people think she is a diva. She has accomplished more in this decade that most people will not even get to doing. Not to mention she has an ass that is probably the most worshipped ass in all of Hollywood. If there is any doubt as to why Triumph the Insult Comic Dog would beg her to let him "sniff (her) butt," just check out the video. She's hot. She's multi-talented. She's set for life. She's asstastic. She's Jennifer Lopez.

Happy Birthday to Britney Spears, bitch!

Yeah, this is probably what will happen when I get married, forgetting the wife's birthday (at least I remembered today is WILF Wednesday, so make sure to stay tuned for that later tonight). But yesterday was the 27th birthday of my number one celebrity gal, Britney Spears. And to echo the statements of my buddy Victor Field, if you ain't down with the fact that Britney is back, I got two words for ya. SUCK IT! And to celebrate the b-day of the Princess of Pop, let's go back in time to 1998 and work our way back to 2008. That's right, the entire Britney Spears video collection, right here at DIUIIT313B! Enjoy. I know I will. P.S., Vic, she's coming back to London on June 4. Ken, there's Uncasville on March 26. Vermmy, there's Atlanta on March 5. Brandon and Butch, there's Los Angeles on April 16 and Anaheim on April 19. My best shot is Toronto on March 18.

Britney Spears - I Love Rock'n'roll
Uploaded by johann1418

Britney Spears - Boys Co (Ed Remix Feat Pharrell Williams Of N E R D) (2002)

What a wonderful trip down Mammary, er, Memory Lane. May Britney have many more great years ahead of her.

TiVo Guide Week of December 1, 2008 *spoiler alert*

"Shrek the Halls" Shrek, Fiona and the kids try to celebrate the holidays as a family, but visits by Donkey, Puss in Boots, Gingerbread Man and others turn a cozy gathering into a chaotic Christmas. Voices include Mike Myers, Cameron Diaz, Eddie Murphy and Antonio Banderas. Monday at 8 on ABC.

"Prison Break" As Michael, Linc, Sara, Sucre and Mahone regroup, Gen. Krantz reasserts his control of the Company in no uncertain terms as he scrambles to regain Scylla. Later, T-Bag gets a new partner in crime, and Michael and Linc have a critical meeting with Sen. Conrad Dallow (David Clennon). Monday at 9 on Fox.

"Boston Legal" When Denny receives bad news about the state of his Alzheimer's, Alan goes before the Massachusetts Supreme Court to plead for access to an experimental drug that could help his condition. Meanwhile, Jerry and Katie try to help a girl get into Harvard after her SAT scores arouse suspicion, and Catherine Piper (Betty White) returns. Monday at 10:01 on ABC.

"Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town" Fred Astaire and Mickey Rooney are among those who lend their voices to this holiday tale, which explains the legend of Santa Claus and how he began delivering toys to children on Christmas Eve. As a young man, he tries to deliver toys to the kids of Sombertown, but is met with opposition by the bitter Burgermeister Meisterburger, a mayor who hates toys and deems them “illegal, immoral, unlawful.” Other voices include Keenan Wynn, Joan Gardner, Paul Frees. Tuesday at 8 on ABC.

"According to Jim" In the eighth-season premiere, the older kids give in to Jim's request to do the household chores after he blames them for losing one of the twin's blankets. Tuesday at 9 on ABC.

"Real Housewives of Orange County" Gretchen persuades her fiancé, Jeff, to go motorcycle shopping; Lauri visits her daughter Ashley and learns about her start-up skin-care business; Vicki and Donn have a date night, but it turns into a bitter sparring match over their marriage; Tamra's husband, Simon, attempts to start a business working out of their house. Tuesday at 10 on Bravo.

"Pushing Daisies" Ned and Olive's comfort-food competition turns unappetizing when a chef is found dead, and Chuck needs Emerson's help coping with the consequences of her actions. Wednesday at 8 on ABC.

"Grammy Nominations Concert Live!---Countdown to Music's Biggest Night" Nominations for the 2009 Grammy Awards are announced in six categories. The hour includes performances by Christina Aguilera, Mariah Carey, Celine Dion, the Foo Fighters, B.B. King, John Mayer and Taylor Swift at the Nokia Theatre L.A. Live. Swift and LL Cool J host. Also: a celebration of the Grammy Museum's grand opening in Los Angeles. Wednesday at 9 on CBS.

"Law & Order" A tourist is murdered, and the case sends Bernard and Lupo to upstate New York for clues. Dianne Cary: Katee Sackhoff. Wednesday at 10 on NBC.

"Ugly Betty" Financial woes bring Betty and Amanda together for a Mode Web-site column based on a memorable---and expensive---night on the town. Thursday at 8 on ABC.

"Barbara Walters Special" Walters' 16th annual "10 Most Fascinating People" special. This year's list includes Tom Cruise, Miley Cyrus, Tina Fey, Rush Limbaugh, Michael Phelps and Will Smith. The No. 1 choice will be announced on the program. Thursday at 10:01 on ABC.

"Sarah Silverman Program" Sarah and Brian experience varying levels of success when they set out to coin words that they hope will become part of society's lexicon of slang terms. Thursday at 10:30 on Comedy Central.

"Batman: The Brave and the Bold" Batman helps Aquaman, who is being targeted by Ocean Master and Black Manta. Friday at 8 on Cartoon.

"Merry Christmas, Drake & Josh!" While working as Santa and his sidekick, Drake and Josh promise a little girl that she and her foster family will have a great Christmas. After some zany antics, the boys land in court, and the judge rules they must keep their promise or go to jail. Judge Newman: Henry Winkler. Bludge: Kimbo Slice. Friday at 8 on Nickelodeon.

"Star Wars: The Clone Wars" An assassin targets Ahsoka and Luminara as they escort Nute Gunray to trial. Friday at 9 on Cartoon.

"Giants" A tribute to Alan Jackson. Performers include Dierks Bentley, Miranda Lambert, Martina McBride, Brad Paisley, George Strait, Taylor Swift and Lee Ann Womack. Taped at Nashville's Ryman Auditorium. Saturday at 9 on CMT.

"The Christmas Choir" A run-in with a homeless man inspires a recently dumped workaholic (Jason Gedrick) to organize a choir at a local shelter with help from a nun (Rhea Perlman). Tyrone Benskin, Marianne Farley, Cindy Sampson. Saturday at 9 on Hallmark.

"Flirting With Forty" A divorced mother (Heather Locklear) approaching her 40th birthday takes a vacation to Hawaii and soon finds herself in an unexpected romance with a much younger man (Robert Buckley). Based on the novel by Jane Porter. Saturday at 9 on Lifetime.

"The Librarian: The Curse of the Judas Chalice" Bookish brainiac Flynn Carsen (Noah Wyle) teams up with a New Orleans jazz singer (Stana Katic) to rescue a kidnapped scientist (Bruce Davison) and protect a sacred chalice, thereby foiling a plot that would give new life to a notorious vampire. The third installment in the "Librarian" cable-movie franchise, directed by Jonathan Frakes. Sunday at 8 on TNT.

"Desperate Housewives" Lynette protects her son; Carlos realizes Gaby's family sacrifices; Bree wants Andrew to know that she accepts him for who he is; Katherine finds happiness; Susan and Mike come to a realization about their relationship; and Dave begins to lose his grip. Sunday at 9 on ABC.

"Leverage" A drama about a team of high-tech Robin Hoods who scam greedy corporations and corrupt entities that have victimized average citizens. First up: The crack crew---led by a sly former insurance sleuth (Timothy Hutton)---works for an aeronautics exec whose airplane designs were stolen by his business nemesis. The team includes an ace thief (Beth Riesgraf); a computer virtuoso (Aldis Hodge); a hardfisted "retrieval specialist" (Christian Kane); and a grifter (Gina Bellman). Sunday at 10 on TNT.

313's Heroes and Goats

From the Titans vs. Lions game

The Hero: Chris Johnson. The Titans rookie carried 16 times for 125 yards and two touchdowns, including a 58-yarder.
The Goats: The Lions. Except for Jason Hanson, every segment of the team was miserable. That's how you lose by 37 points.